Old Ladies and Stroke

I got this in my email today, kinda not the usual jokes i would crack and its kinda deep too, but if you read really carefully you will catch the punchline and its farking hillarious too!!!


Three old ladies went for a walk in the park, they were suddenly approached by a man who flashed at them, two of them had a stroke - the third wasn't quick enough..


gedit?? LOL!!!

How to Cook the World Simplest Western Food

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Mahfulat today busy like a dog!!!! Lunch time only got time to post this entry. (while eating tahpao econ lice)

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Conversations taken from my tag board :

Cav: Wingz ar... can teach how to cook lamb chop ma?

Wingz: Cav : 1 thing i dun eat in my is mutton ... soli never cooked mutton b4 ... maybe u can check with foodcrazee lol

Cav: foodcrazee? mat dong dong lei geh? Then teach me how to cook some western foods =D

Wingz: Cav : foodcrazee is a food blogger ler. You want me to teach you how to cook western food ka? Ok Ok... Tonight i make a post for you ok?

Cav: Cool! Thanks Wings!

OK lets begin shall we?

This is the simplest western food recipe ever! There is only4 steps. If you cant do this, then you just gotta accept the fact that you are farkingly useless when come to cooking! You will live on econo-mee lice for the rest of your life!!!!

1. Now 1st, you gotta get yourself a deep fryer (like the one in the pikture below) use wok also can but you wont look as sos-pissed-tee-kated laaa!! (lets face it, those bachelor cook bcoz they wanna impless chicks oni mahhh right anot?!! kakakaka!!!)



Then you fill it up with cooking oil, use normal knife brand cooking oil can ledi wan but if you wanna impless the chicks then u use olive oil la! Olive oil 1 liter if extra virgin wan hor RM 50!!! MCH!! more expensive than the main course la!!!

ok ok kambek to our cooking.

2. Pour your ciplak local cheap cooking oil into the deep fryer or wok untill got around3-4 inch depth. If too shallow knot fry properly and if too much dem wasteful (I no u dem cheapskate wan!!! so i try to save for u! kakakaka)


3. Seasoning : We using simple seasoning only salt and pepper .... dont taruk ajinomoto, chicks dun like wan (to show off you are a very healthy person mah) ... if you taruk ajinomoto they thot you are some kinda freako! so even tho u like ajinomoto but pretend you dont like them la! Wait till u suck-ses-fooly kauED her only u reveal this secret la!! That time u tarukED her ledi anything goes la! KAKAKAKAKA!!!





And now for the finale!

4. The main course! before we go to the main course, lemme briefly tell you the way you should cook this food. You should make sure the oil in the deep fryer alredi farking hot ... how to know its hot?? Dip your finger inside la diu! if it hurts a whole lot then its hot enuff! KAKAKA!! (Mahai pulez dun tell me you are bright enuff to goan dip your fingers into the hot oil ok?)

Then you take the steel basket (come with deep fryer wan) and fill it with the food and u submerge then into the deep fryer just now. Fry for 5 minutes under medium heat, after 5 minutes remove from deep fryer and leave on a place for another 10 minutes for it to cool down. After 10 minutes ledi ... season with salt and pepper then can serve ledi, if you wanna impless the chick then serve with half cut tomato (RM1.49/kilo @ tesco) and some parsley or salad leaves. !!!

What the main course?? yahor ... i havent tell you whats the main course yet ... soli soli ... too much work till i blurr blurr ledi ...

You wanna know whats the main course is then you scroll down abit la ok? So long n help you exercise your fingers ledi ....

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. What if i tell you now that i derno what is the main course? You will kill me anot ar? hahaha! got lar got lar! keep scrolling!
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.Mahai if your gf like this meal then you better tell him you learnt it from Rojaks Daily wan!!!
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.Then if you got laid ledi .... remember to gimme an angpow ... if not next time knot get laid anymore wan!!! kakakaka!!!
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.Yala yala!!! mahai dun curse me larrr ... almost there ledi!!! move that fat fingers!!!!
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Ladies and Genitalmen!!!

The easiest Western Food to prepare!

FRENCH FRIES!!!!!
Please refer tot he above pikture on how to make your french fries look good!

I no bruff you wan! French fries is leehly Western food lei geh!

Happy Cooking Cav!!! HAHAHA!!!

Jangan marah bang! joking ajer! lol!!!!

Ahpek & Tourist in Port Dickson

One day Ahpek and his buddy Ahbeng were lepaking at this bus stop ogling at lengluis kambing down from the bus.

After a while there is one Angmoh stop his car at the bus stop and get down. The Angmoh walks towards Ahpek and Ahbeng and this is what he said to them :

Angmoh : Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?

*Ahpek and Ahbeng stared at the Angmoh blur blur lidat*

Angmoh : Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?

*Ahpek and Ahbeng continue to stare at him*

Angmoh : Parlare Italiano?

*Still no response from Ahpek and Ahbeng *

Angmoh : Hablan ustedes Espanol?

*Ahpek and Ahbeng now mia face lagi blur*

The Angmoh tulan ledi .... fark 9 them in a foreign language and gets back into the car and drove off.

Then Ahpek turned to Ahbeng and said :

Ahpek : Eh ... i think hor ... we should go and learn some foreign language la
Ahbeng : Why?
Ahpek : Learn more language then at least if got Angmoh tok to us we know how to answer mah!
Ahbeng : Cheh!!! That Angmoh just now know 4 different language and it didnt do him any good also mahhh!
Ahpek : Mahai!!! Why you dunwan answer him just now??!!
Ahbeng : I wanna see how many language he can come out with ler ... mana tau up to 4 language only he tulan ledi!
Ahpek :

Birthday Wishes for Lisa(SCB)

If you still remember our friend SCB (Lisa) who went into comma in April'06 leaving behind a 7 yrs old daughter, well ... her birthday is around the corner (5th Sept 2006) and 9393 organised a little project to wish her a Happy Birthday and a speedy recovery.

To take part in this meaningful project, please head on to this BLOG and follow the instructions there.

Tenkiu for your participation.

Wingz

Watchout Tigerwood! Here Comes Lil Devil!!!!

I figured if i start training him now, in a few years time i can enroll him into the junior golfer championship ledi ..... then give him another 5 years then can turn PRO ledi!!!! YAHOO!!! FAT DAT LAR!!!!

That time i can pencen ledi .... carry his golf clubs, follow him around touring countries and kauing luis LOL!! Wuahh!!! my dream can come true ledi!!! (lemme dream awhile can anot?)

Lil Devil praticing his putting on the mat.

Look at the ball boy! look at the ball!

Wuah!!! U see his style also know hes gifted la!!!

Which kompeni mau seponsor my son?? faster come!!! limited sponsorship available only!!!! lol!!!

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The Weekend Father and Son Time Alone

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WARNING : This post might bored certain people to death, if you are not a family kinda person, you might wanna skip reading this post. Others aunties, uncles and married couples please proceed at own risk.

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Kids grow up dem fast, hes no longer a baby now ... it was just like yesterday when i have him in my arms but hes walking and running by himself now. I m glad he still want me to carry him around most of the time ... give him another 2 years he will refuse to lemme carry him anymore.

I took the liberty to spend as much time as I could afford with him, watching him grow and monitoring his tranformation from a toddler to a boy. Every moment we spent togehter is precious and whenever i have the chance i would wanna record it down and remind myself that my boy is growing up.

Eventually he will leave us, I do not wanna blame myself for not spending enough time with him. I guessed most fathers do not realise this untill its too late, I do not wanna be one of them.

Hes kinda rebellious even at this young tender age .... I really gotta keep an eye on him just to make sure he do not turn out to be a burden to the society.

I seen too many parents neglected their kids spending most of their time pursuing money and at the end of the day... money wont do them any good either, but sad to say that most parents still do not see this and continue to follow the same path. I want my kid to tell all his frends "me and my father do lotsa stuffs together wan"

We went to the playground today ..... he really enjoyed himself.

Lil Devil at the swing

he called himself "monkey" .... great! now i got a Lil Monkey Devil.

hes trying to hold on to the monkey bar for as long as he could .....

Thats my son :)

Lil kids can think too you know? seen here is my lil devil going into deep thots ... I think hes wondering whats for dinner tonite lol!

Hi! Ahpah!

Lil Devil on a Slide

Lil Devil in a tunnel

Hes aint a burden, Hes my son!

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Weekend - Cocka's Birday Dinner

erm .... pics of Cocka's Birday dinner ... enjoy!

Cocka recomended Restaurant Hooi Loong, Damansara Jaya. As usual ... the taste of the food isnt that all important. Infact, i dont even know whether it tasted good anot .... all i'd remember is the good company and all the laughters. This once a month meeting up with jolly good frends is kinda therapeutic and rejunative, all you ever got to do is to luff like sohais and leave all your troubles behind.

I reckon pretty soon we could start a professional stress councilling group and attendees will be charge a bloody high fees in exchange for a sane and stress free mind lol!!!

5 varieties dish ( 5 yuet fun)

As usual, when it comes to food ... i dont have much willpower .... the above pic is not even taken by me, i was too busy eating lol!

The kek, took the pic with my palm zire 72 (which sucks for pic taking)

Birthday Low cutting kek

kek from secret recipe

I derno why Jason took this pic also but it look nice!

1st time meeting them, 2 lengluis and 1 lengjai! one of the lenglui si a blogger!!!

Nah! a clearer pic of the lenglui Jian, Ahtak's Lenglui gf and Lengjai Ahtak courtesy of Jason KL Podcast

Lenglui Ahmay caught bitting her nails bcoz she beh tahan looking at 'that' lengjai lol

Erm ... i m prohibited from showing their faces but they dint say knot show legs wat? see all the lengluis legs anot? the only mahlatlow legs here is cocka's one .... can tell which one anot?


Hope to upload more pics as i get them from the geng.
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Lets Talk Bout TV - Trio And A Bed

MY Favourite channel on Astro is Wah Lai Toi (Channel 30) , normally if god permits I will hog the TV from 8:30pm till 10:30pm. Thats when my fav TVB series will be air mah!

Last time they broadcast 2 TVB series back to back, the first one starts at around 8:30 and ends at 9:30 then followed by another one which starts on 9:30 and ended around 10:20pm ... this were done with alotssssssssss of advertisementsssssssssssss breaks in between which, is still tolerable la!

But now..... they got this new program starring a few of the local lengluis called "TRIO & a BED"

'Trio And A Bed' is an interactive drama shown on Astro Wah Lai Toi, a pay TV channel in Malaysia, where viewers can vote on character decisions and the outcome. The show focuses on the complex chemistry and relationships between the three guys and three girls. It stars:

Carmen Soo as Charmaine
Amber Chia as Isabella
Annabelle Kong as Ho Hua Meow
Daniel Tan as Heman
Danny Wan as Anerd
Jeffery Chong as Sam

If you do not know what is this "interactive drama" is all about, lemme enlight you a bit. They will show you a short drama (about 10 minutes) and then at the end of the drama they will ask you to choose (by voting via sms) how you want the next chapter to turn out. Normally you would be given 2 choices to make (you are kinda helping one of the character to make decision lidat la) The choice are A and B.

Example : The show ended with Isabella indecissive of what she wanna eat tomlo. Now you all gotta help her by voting thru sms, TYPE "TRIO A" if you want her to eat banana or type "TRIO B" if you want her to eat papaya. (of coz those sms are chargable la! n its NOT cheap!)

C'mon la! do you really believe that they will count/look at your votes and then only decides how the drama would turn out today? If you really belif that then pls goan kick yourself in the balls (if you dont have balls then just slap yourself silly).

Do you even know how long does it takes to make a 10 minits drama with all the props and equipments and actors and locations. If you really think your votes means anything then too bad lor LOL!

They dont even show you how many people voted for choice A or choice B, its complete UN-invisible! its up to them to decide how they want the drama to turn out! So stop being so blardee naive ok? You do not run the show!

My frend whois able to read chinese newspaper told me this :

Me : Eh wassup with this trio and a bed drama?
Frend : Oh the one got show a few chinese lengluis one ar?
Me : yar yar that one lar ... i see the show got let u choose how you want the show to turn out to be one wor!
Frend : hahaha! no nid waste your money goan vote la! you want to know how the story turned out to be you just read chinese newspaper under the TV program section la!
Me : Ah?? you mean before we vote the newspaper also know the result ledi?
Frend : abuden?

I derno how true is that bcoz i cant read no chinese newspaper, maybe you should doublecheck with those who can.

Anyway I m being called to go into a meeting now, MCH saturday also got meeting!!! ARGH!!!

So, after reading my post do you think this Interactive/ reality show is for real? I mean you seriously think your vote(s) would make a different?


1) Type Wingz Hansem A and send sms to 66967 if :

You think your vote(s) really got influence on the way the drama evolves.

2) Type Wingz Hansem B and send sms to 66967 if :

You think your vote(s) have nothing watsoever influence on the drama.

Have a nice weekend and thanks for your votes!

Adios SUCKERS!
WUAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!

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New American Holiday

One day a very powderfool middle east terrorist (MR. U-no-Hu) kamED to Malaysia to seek the advice of our fehmes Fengshui master Ms. Lilian Chan dot NET.

Mr U-no-Hu is heavily disguised and also surrounded by 30 bodyguards when he enters the opis of the fengshui master. After a brief introduction they sit down and things started to get serious.

Lilian : Mr. U-no-Hu, what can I do for you today?
UnoHu : Err .. i come to you to seek advice, I wanna take my country bek from those blardee amadikans but lately i very SUEY ... lotsa my mahjais kena killed! I cant afford anymore losses, therefore I come to seek your advice.
Lilian : Erm ... lemme see your palms

*UnoHu extend both palms*

Lilian : Erm ... your effort will not be fruitful and there is something i derno whether to tell you anot .... i sked you angry with me after i tell you then u rape n kill me.
UnoHu : I wont kill you lar ... i plomise wan! faster tell!!! I wanna know the truth nuthin but the truth!
Lilian : Ok lar i take your word for it! ..... I saw in your palm just now that you are destined to die on an Amadikans Holiday.
UnoHu : You sure?
Lilian : absolutely!
UnoHu : Which holiday???!!!!
Lilian : It wouldnt matter ..... whatever day you die ... that will bekam an Amdikans Holiday!

This is WAR...

Knn................... ohh wanna sat lei lang me now la wingz.... eventho u my boss but i no face gip liao..

Ok... before that.. fact is..

i am exactly 112.9874736859 kg.. ok .. not 9Xx.xXx - i give credits to wing who thinks i am lighter..

The f*cking haze is back.. so not that i am not concern or somewhat but please buy a the penguin ionizer from us to booze sales..yeah right so that i can throw my f*cking quota to wingz and i can continuously insult him. Having a boss-employee relationship is not easy these days. Either i kena f*ck or he kena f*ck. So if i do my part ..he will shaddap, bent over and let me f*ck.. if not......it will be reversed roles lar..

I in dilemma now..cos hor.. i stardee until standard 3 nia.. standard 4 onwards hor..i mengemis underneath penang bridge liao geh... then of all person hor...wingz chap me back and ask me work for him geh.. so work work har... gaji little but work like cinderella... damn kesian.. bonus also gip 1/8 bulan oni wo.. tns.... reason he gave: cos 1 = must and 8 = luck ...... so Achelli i wanna quit my job geh.. but...no one else wanna employ me woh... so no choice ler.. i am telling this cos wingz cannot simply fire me mar.. if not i will labour law him woh...

*paiseh*..

Ok.. i tell u sumthing lar.. for some reason, my boss wingz like to spend time in pharmacy geh... sometimes he even so pin tai go stalk all the piao mei with short skirt and take pichure also.. u think he so damn good ar.. abor you think he go shooting range for fun ar? he achelli wanna practise mata only geh..

So that day hor.... he saw this damn super chick working at this pharmacy la (name and location of pharmacy not mentioned just incase), so wing... stim dy geh.. beh tahan dy.. so he approach her asking for condom la.. (to want her to think he is good and practise safe sex geh)

Wingz: Wei piao mei... i wan buy condom ler.. *make shy face*
Staff: neh choose yourself lerrrr *points to the variety
Wingz: but but but...... i dont know wo... my size so big.. u sure this sizes all can fit or not..
Staff: *bit malu and blushing dy* harrrrrrrrrrr....
Wingz: like this ler... you put your hand it and testing 1st ler.. then u suggest the size for me ok?
Staff: ok la..
*wingz face light up with delight.. and make high high dei mia face*
**staff put her hand in and mor mor abit**
***she then quickly took her hand out***
Wingz: keng lehh... keng lehh... how ah piao mei.. i damn big hor.. ???
Staff: hmmpph... i know what to recommend you dy....
*packs a few 'special packaging' looking condoms in a plastic back and tut tut the cash machine'

***siaran tergendala***

My boss say if i tell what happen.... i will kena fired woh...f*ck larr..
^according to labour law, if boss instruct liao... then if still do means integrity issue woh.. so... have to obey woh... knn^

tiu...... this linpeh also another one la... i asking for bek up here he dunno go where.. then he jadi batu api summore say i fat woh..... that day in the office there i mopping floor he suddenly come step step with his dirty shoe.. then purposely spit inside boss mia drink wo..

My boss also never say anything..... i think he black magik my boss ... i think he gip wingz kkj kuk fan (normally known as nasi himpit cipap...but.. linpeh got nasi himpit kkj only).. no wonder my boss no scold him ler.. sales he do also like sh*t..

ish.. if you all wan to know the ending of the scene in the pharmacy only if one thing happen... the comment for this post hit over 100... power of the community mar.. no bek up...i will kena tiao.. got bek up.. my boss has to bend over.. ngkkakakaka

Shireen K and the Digital Weighing Machine

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Am I the only one who thinks its farking hot & stuffy in KL today??!!! My left eye starts to tears since this morning ..... mch thanks to the farking haze!!! The haze is here!!!! Dont go out! Stay indoor!!! and of coz get yourself an Air Filter Cum Ionizer to clean the air in your house!

My brader started this "A Smiley A Day" site ... hop over there to post a smiley!

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Last week me and Shireen K was at this manufacturing exhibition where we stumbled upon a company displaying their range of weighing machines, we went in to take a look ....

Shireen was quite impressed with one of the particular model, its a state-of-the-art digital weighing machine, she was pressing all the buttons and turning the dials on that machine trying to figure out how it works.

Outta no where suddenly a Sales-rep jumped out and approached her :

Salesrep : Miss you got high taste! this is our latest state of the art digital weighing machine! its not even in the market yet but I see you so interested with this machine ... why dont you stand onnit and give it a try? if you like it then i give you 70% discount! Just for you!
Shireen : 70%??!!! Dunwan ler .... i shy ler ....
Salesrep : no nid shy ler .... I promised i wont look at the digital display, no one will know your weight wan!
Shireen : Dunwan ler ... shy ler .... later everyone knows my weight!
Salesrep : ok ok i give you this musking tape la ... you cover the display so no one will know except you ok?
Shireen : Musking tape ar? sure knot see after tape?
Salesrep : Knot see la!! the tape dem thick wan how to see thru it?
Shireen : Ok lor .... you promise not to peek hor!!
Salesrep : I promise! I wont peek!

Shireen then take the tape and stick it over the digital Display, she stand onnit then nothing happened ....

Shireen : Eh eh ... why nothing happening one?
Salesrep : oh i forgot to tell you ... you gotta turn it on first wan! nehhh.. press the red button to turn it on
Shireen : This red button izzit?
Salesrep : yar yar that button ... press and see

Shireen pressed the button whereupon a VERY LOUD digital voice from within the machine announced "Your Weight is Ninety XXXX Kilograms."

WUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!


MCH! that Salesrep dem bad hor??!!!! *Hide one korner continue luffing*

Traditional Chinese Breakfast with Ethan

Yesday nite slept very erly so dint post anything .... today pulak got Monday Blues therefore no mood to post jokes also. Now lunch time i dem free, since i mood to post jokes i post baby's Ethan pics la!

Yesday morning we bring Ethan and Family to experience the authentic chinese breakfast, we brought them to Toechew Chinese Restaurant in Pudu (besides Pudu Jail), it wasnt the first time for my buddy (I brought him here last time when he came with his dad) but this is the first time experiencing the authentic chinese breakfast for the rest of his family.

7 erly 8 erly Lil Devil alredi wakeup

This fler 7 erly 8 erly alredi blocking the main entrance of Federal Hotel.

The Main entrance of Federal Hotel

Lil Ethan morning look .... see his eyes anot? Big like guli!!!

Lil Ethan make lansi face lol!

Come Msia a few days only sit also got asian style ledi ... this fler got potential
to be Ahlong nx time lol!

Lil Ethan getting cranky

Lil Ethan attaking my phone

Everyone enjoyed the breakfast, altho in the beginning Janel (the doter) kinda hesitated abit (especially when i asked her to try the "Siew Yoke" but after a bite she sapu-ED the whole plate! LOL!

Ethan loves the Har Kau and his mum loves the lormaikai, My buddy still like the roast duck we pratically whack the whole duck in less than 30 minutes.

They left KL early in the morning today and before they left they made me promised to them that I will go over to Perth by the end of the year ...... bloggers gathering in Perth anyone?


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Wingz moment

I went shopping with Wingz the other day... we walked into a pharmacy and he straight away headed to the assistant whispering......

Wingz: wei wei piao mei...
Assistant: hamik hamik..
Wingz: you got sell........ the kar cheng(backside) mia deodorant bor..
Assistant: what talking you.. plis speaking english can or not..
Wingz: neh.... the one make your bekside nice smell geh....
Assistant: eerrrr no woh...
Wingz: got geh got geh.........
Assistant: aiyah you ah!!!... no have la no have la... u find bekside geh you go gay shop hou mou

*me malu dy... fast fast go hide*

Assistant starts walking away and resuming her duty...

Wingz: wei.. but really ge woh... i owaz buy the kar cheng(backside) pang jui(fragrance) from here ge wo....
Assistant: u got find this whole shop or not?
Wingz: Not yet...
Assistant: but i work here so long i dont think we sell ge loh
Wingz: but but but........
Assistant: ok .. i tell you what, you go find the thing you looking for in this store.. and if you can find it here in my store, i will sama sama use it with you ok.. better yet.. let you apply for me ok?

*wingz face lights up with delight*

** after a while**

Wingz: wei piao meiiii... here i kam!!!!.. i found it liao.. fast fast take out your pants we use the kar cheng pang jui together!!!
Assistant: where?? where ??? show me 1st ...

*wingz hand her a bottle of deodarant*


Assistant: harr... this is a normal armpit mia deo worrrr.....
Wingz: eh.... you blind ge mou...
Assistant: what ???
Wingz: you say things mm suen sou is it now... say dy let me apply this pang jui on your bekside .. then now i found the pang jui you dun keep promise is it???
Assistant: but.... no this is a deo??

*Getting annoyed, wingz snatch the bottle of deo and read out loud*

Wingz: summore say i kenot speak engrish woh......
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"TO APPLY, PUSH UP BOTTOM"

Linpeh and His Huge Farm in Amadika

A handful of us got invited to celebrate Linpeh birthday on Saturday afternoon in Cheras Leisure Mall. By the request of Linpeh ... this is a ALL-MAHLARTLOW-GATHERING and all the others mahlartlows dint wanna come bcoz they knew they aint gonna be any chicks around.

So left only 4 of us ... Me, Linpeh, Cocka and 9393 it was seriously fun, especially with Linpeh around. He got so many tales to tell.

Today he told us about his life during his migration to Amadika so many years ago (no lar so many years ago doesnt serve as an indication to how old Linpeh is today la! LOL!). I bet many of you dint know that Linpeh is an Amadikan dint you? I dint know too! not till today ....

Anyway Linpeh was telling us that once upon a time he migrated to Amadika and he bought this huge huge farm in Texas.

Linpeh : you know anot .... last time when i stay in Amadika that time i buy this farm SOOOOOO BIGGGGGGGGGG!!!!

Cocka : How big?
Linpeh : SO BIG so the electricity company refused to pull their cable to supply us with electricity. They said if they pull they will rugi bcoz our farm is so big and the cables requires to run across our farm would cost millions of dollars.
9393 : then how u get power?
Linpeh : We hafta use wind power lor ... so we installed these big ass fan that will generates power as they spin.

Me : Wuah!! terror leh! own power sial!
Linpeh : Terror lehhh? then hor we got all kinda animals innit, we got horses la ... we got cows la... we got sheeps la .... we got pigs ... all the animals got their own farm wan.
Cocka : Wuah so big leh your farm!
Linpeh : Lidat u call big ka? there is more leh! We also got plant wheats lar .... soya beans la... potatos la.... apples la .... orens la ... pears la ..... grape la suma got! Every types of plant we using a few hundred acres.
9393 : Wuah bigger than KLIA ledi lor lidat!
Linpeh : That one of coz la! Then you know how we move around in the farm anot?
Cocka : you ride horse wan right? I know Texas got alot of cowboys wan.
Linpeh : oi! i kam from Mareysia wan la! mana tau ride horse? we use kapcai la! U know kapcai anot?


Cocka : i know i know but why use kapcai?
Linpeh : bcoz my farm very big mah!! use kapcai faster than use horse leh!
Cocka : ohhh lidat la ...
Linpeh : But you see hor ... even tho we using kapcai not fast enuff also ...
Me : Why why?
Linpeh : Last time hor ... i try riding my kapcai to round round my farm la .... i start in the morning from my farm house i go round my whole farm and untill the sun go down ledi i also still havent reach home yet! you say my farm big anot la!!
Me : AAHHH!!! DIU!!! lidat mia kapcai I last time also got lar!!! it also took me a whole bloody day to get home also!!!
Cocka & 9393 : KAKAKAKAKAKA !!!!

Happee Belated BIRDay lar Latuk Linpeh!

A Week With Little Ethan

This fler is very very very very cute!!! Everytime i see him i wanna pinch his chubby face!!! Hes very notti too! cant sit down quietly wan ... everytime he sees me poiting the camera at him he will run and hide!! So, its not easy to take his pictures

Anyway due to popular demand I gonna post some of the pictures i took while we are having dinner at Tsui Village Restaurant at Low Yat Plaza on Friday.

2 Lil Devils in a chinese restaurant

See what see?

You cant catch me!!!

The Killa Look

I got Milk! You dont have!

You say cute anot?!!!! Wat you waiting for??? fast fast go make one as cute as Ethan la!!!! FAITIT!!!!

Anoder community projek by Rojaks Daily to expand the total populations of Malaysia.

The Reason Why I been Sabotaged!

The person who has been threatening & sabotaging Rojaks Daily finally explained why he is doing that :

Anonymous said...

Hey, it's me again, the famous Anon....wahh this thing is getting serious meh? easy, easy....small matter one...:)
you lially wanna know why the heck am i doing this freaking stuff? check out the COMMENTS in this link: :)

http://rojaks.blogspot.com/2006/06/scenes-we-would-like-to-see-in-fifa.html

yup, it's SIMPLY bcoz of that...those who gave the 'f' bombs (yup, those bad words describe your attitude) should now take them back...:)
remember, dont ever blame me...you started first...

p/s: maybe you shud submit a post to expose this comment so dat everibodi can read it, just like the way you expose those messages I wrote...:)

last word: think before you say something.....:)

5:17 PM

SEE ANOT??!!! he want those who scolded him to take back your words! Only he is allowed to scold people!! but people knot scold him!!!!

Ok, lets go back and see why hes so tulan ok? This is his comments taken from the post HERE

Anonymous said... (This is him la)

this is probably the stupidest blog on earth i've ever found and most likely was created by the ugliest creature on earth (you, of course). and hey, please stop smiling coz it's so way disgusting..seriously, you've already ruined my mood today..and that's too bad for me and my friends..duh..this is my first and surely last time being on your shameless silly blog..

it's not nice to meet you at all..

11:14 AM

Chapree Da Grande said...

Allo annonymous...KAYU LA LU!!

That's too many balls and birds that I could handle. I sha purify mysef in Clorox now.

11:30 AM

pisang goreng 115,NF said...

hey anoynomous! if you do't like this blog DO NOT come again! this blog is for happy wan ....... and if you read this again put your name don't put anoymous you chicken!

12:04 PM

Superb and Gary said...

Anonymous: Die u farker!

Wingz said...

anon : hahaha since when i got put my pics in this blog har? you obviously dun watch enuff tv and you prolly dont have much frends either kakakaka!!!

The fler is angry at me because he was scolded by other readers for the nasty comment he made!! Buden what does that gotta do with me huh? I where got scold you? Why you sabo me??!!! Furthermore, you have to understand one thing ... i never asked that person to come here, he is here voluntarily. He came, he read, he commented anonymously, his comments pissed of some of the readers and he is taking it out on me! Wuah! Lucky me!

Then he go around my blog threatening to sabo all my ads by clicking onnit multiple times (I know he got fast corporate line la) but why take it out on me ler?

See lar! I post joke to make people happy and at the end what i am getting in return? ..... *sigh* blogging is not as fun as it used to be anymore!



To Anon Saboteur, maybe your got bored of the view on the 10th Floor ledi thats why you looking for some other kind of excitements by wrecking other people's blog? I think you too free ledi ler ... btw your Corporate line fast anot ar?

Your ident also unique ler! Wannas wor! When wanna blanja me eat Kelana Seafood lar? You might as well gime your name ler ... I pass thru Kelana Jaya that time can call you come out yum char also. Take care ok? I lebiu Deep deep!!!

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Nigerian Scam in Malaysia??!!!

Today I received this email :

From: lina binta

Signed-By: yahoo.com | Mailed-By: yahoo.com

To: selset@streamyx.com

Cc: s.vijay@time.com.my, sabariah_mn@time.net.my, sahelidatta@hotmail.com, salih@iss.nl, sam02@time.net.my, samng@time.net.my, sanomat.rii@formin.fi, schmalz@bayernkurier.de

Date: Aug 18, 2006 11:10 AM

Subject: YOUR URGENT ATTENTION PLEASE

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am Mrs Lina Binta Idris, from Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia. My husband had just file for dissolution of our marriage,the divorce suit is pending at court of law here in malaysia, if he succeed it means he is entitle to half of my money and property i inherited from my late father.

Right now i have($5.5Mus)fixed deposited in the Bank.I have contacted you to assist in transfering this money to your nominated foreign bank account before the court decides the divorce case.

All legal docoment to back up this transaction will be provide by my personal attorney Barr.Ahmad Salim (email >< (barr_as@z6.com ) who will henceforth negotiate with you on the terms of this proposal. All i need from you, is your honest cooperation.

If this business proposition offends your moral values,please do accept my apology.Please contact my attorney at once to indicate
your interest.

With best regards,
Mrs Lina B. Idris.

See? What da fark is $5.5Mus anyway? they dont even know the currency we using in Malaysia and yet they calimed they are from Malaysia!!! Stupid scammers!!!!

To prevent from being victimised by these scammers, just dont be greedy .... money dont drop from the sky and if you know that you will prolly fark them no free!!!

Now anyone here free enuff to play some game with the author of the above email? send him/her an email and see if she replies anot lol!!!

MCH! Lina Binta!!! Wat farking name is that?

.

Threatened Again! Bloggers Beware!

If this can happen to me, sooner or later it will happen to you too.....

I was being warned about placing advertisements on my blog by an anonymous person who left disturbing messages in my tag board. To avoid my adsense from being banned by Google team I decided to remove them for the time being ..... realising this he got a bit overjoyed and that person keep pressing his luck, finally today hes at it again and this is what he said :

Date : 06-08-09
Time : 09:55:35
Nick : Anon
Message : I dont do anything wrong meh..I am just clicking, that's it..what's wrong with that?

Date : 06-08-09
Time : 09:59:01
Nick : Anon
Message : btw, maybe you shud remove both adster and adbrite before you call me adster/adbrite saboteur.. :-)

Date :06-08-17
Time : 15:35:15
Nick : Anon
Message : hey, it's me again, Anonymous wan..look i warn u last time to fast fast remove ur ads..

Date : 06-08-17
Time : 15:36:59
Nick : Anon
Message : but i can still see them meh.. :)

Date : 06-08-17
Time : 15:40:09
Nick : Anon
Message : that's ok..cos the time will tell one..you have been warnd.. :)

Date : 06-08-17
Time :15:42:00
Nick : Anon
Message : I lially love this game! hope u lially love oso..

Little do I know that even a jokes blog like mine can invite such kinda person ... i do not know why is he doing this nor I would be interested to know.

I wrote to TMnet about this threatening messages and Internet sabotage and they responded, now the question is ... do you think I should go ahead pursuing the culprit or I should I just let it be?

Lemme have your 2 cents pls, I wanna know what you guys think.

*Update : at 5:24pm the person mentioned above logged in to this blog again.

.

Ladies Beware! Crime in Progress!

---

I got these infos from forwarded emails, I dont know how true is this but regardless of whether this is true of false I believe we all can learn alot from these 2 emails. It always pays to be more cautious of your surroundings.

---

From: "Samantha Chong Kok Shinn"
Reply-To:
Date: Fri, 11 Aug 2006 10:02:20 +0800

Dear friends,

This happened in Penang!

This happened to me yesterday ( 30 March 2006 ) and I urged all of you
to be extra careful these days.

I was on sick leave yesterday and after doctor's consultation at Klinik Union, I proceeded to Maybank (Inderawasih branch) nearby to withdraw money from the bank counter. As the amount withdrawn is quite huge, I reminded myself to be extra careful as I have read news about people being robbed just outside the bank. I clutched on tightly to my bag as I walk out of the bank towards my car. I was a bit relieved because a police van just pulled up in front of the bank while I was leaving and seeing that there are policemen around, I felt a bit safer.

I then drove to Carrefour Seberang Jaya to purchase some necessities. After completing my purchases, I took out my car key and was prepared to walk out of the Carrefour complex towards the carpark when I sensed that a man (dark complexion - could be an Indonesian) was walking very fast towards me. I immediately stopped in my tracks and pretended to look at the hair accessories stall that was just at the exit.

My suspicion was confirmed when the man suddenly turned and walked back into the complex. I continued to browse the accessories stall and I can see that the man was standing in front of the Pos Malaysia counter.

After a while when the man was no longer to be seen, I quickly walked out of the complex. I was looking all around the place, head turning left, right and back to ensure that nobody is following me. To my horror, I saw the man again. He also walks out of the complex but turned right heading towards the motorcycle park where another man was waiting for him on a motorcycle. I quickly walked in between the cars parked as I was afraid that they would just ride the motorcycle up to me and snatch my bag if I were to walk in the open.

I walked very, very fast and quickly got in my car and locked it immediately. By now, I can see the motorcycle turning towards where I was and he stopped at the corner just 2 cars away from me. I knew that something is very wrong and I was looking all over the place when I suddenly saw another man running very fast towards my car from behind. He rushed to my passenger side and pulled on my car door aggressively wanting to snatch my handbag that was placed on the passenger seat. There was nobody nearby at the moment and I know I cannot yell for help with the windows closed because nobody would be able to hear my screams.

With a quick action, Iimmediately pressed on my car honk without letting go. This startled the robber and he immediately released my car door handle and dashed towards the man waiting on the motorcycle and they speed off.

For a moment, I sat there stunned. It all happened so fast and I cannot even recall the robber's face. After gaining my composure, I started my engine and drove out of the carpark. I remembered I heard some noise when my car started to move but I dare not go down to check. I was terrified and was constantly looking into the rear mirror to see if there was anybody following me.

I reached home safely and quickly park my car inside the compound and immediately locked the gate. And you know what I found out next? The back tyre on the left side of my car was completely flat! I wonder how I had managed to drive home with such a tyre condition.

So friends, please remind your friends and loved ones to be extra, extra careful of suspicious people. I was lucky because I managed to sense that something is amiss but how many times can we be that lucky, right??

I also learnt my lesson, never ever withdraw money alone. Get someone to accompany you or best still, get a current account or just buy a banker's cheque.

Sincerely,

Joanne Kan

---

Another Email

Ladies, be alert. It is happening in Penang !!



To:

I used to receive forwarded emails regarding incidents of being 'disturbed' by a fake policeman but I don't
really believe that until i met one last saturday.

It was 8.30am when I was driving at Jln Ayer Itam. I noticed a motorbike following me closely. Of course I didnt suspect anything bcos that is the main road to town. However, at the Mobil petrol station, b4 SRJK Shang
Wu, I turned left to Tmn Lumba Kuda & he followed.

This time he was riding the motorbike on my right & took out his handcuff and kept saying "Saya polis". I ignored him. Then at the tmn lumba kuda housing area he overtook my car & stopped his motorbike infront on
me.

I stopped & waited till he got down from his bike then I drove off again. Unfortunately, we met again at the turfclub traffic light. This time, he kept knocking at my window and asking me to co me out from my car. He also showed me a so called police ID card without photo or logo.

I'm very sure that he is not a genuine policeman. Even if he is a real one, and if I did break any traffic rules, he can just send me a summon without needing me to get down from my car.

So, I decided go drive to police station. He followed me till a few hundreds metre b4 I turned to the police station.

He is a medium size Malay guy, abt 165-170cm height. Riding Modenas Kriss 100, PGN 74.

p/s: A REAL policeman ID card is light yellow in color with Logo & the word "polis diraja malaysia " in front. At the back, there will be a passport size photo, name & matriks number.

Hope this thing wont happen again and wont happen to any of you as well.


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Linpeh & Cocka the Garmen Workers

One day Ahpek was waiting for his frend at this petrol stesen while sipping a can of coke, he then noticed there is 2 flers digging at the side of the road .... 1 of them is digging and anoder fler is about 10 feet behind the 1st fler filling back the hole with the dirt which were just dug out by the 1st fler a few minutes ago.


On seing this Ahpek very curious, he walks up to them and asked them :

Ahpek : Oi! what you 2 fler doing here ar? 1 fler dig hole .. the other fler covering back the hole ... u 2 fler got nothing better to do ka?
Linpeh : We are working for the garmen, we just doing our work oni la.
Cocka : Yalar! we work for bandaraya under landscaping wan and our job is to plant tree.
Ahpek : Plant what tree? Where is the tree?
Linpeh : aiyah! this is you all mia fault also! You all always komplen komplen we garmen workers derno how to do work! But now we working u also komplen ....
Cocka : Yala u all only know how to komplen oni la! next time ask us properly what we doing first then only komplen mah.
Ahpek : Yala! i ask ledi lar just now .... i dont see any tree here .... where is the tree?
Linpeh : You see ... our team got 3 members wan ... my job is to dig hole, then Sengkor job is to plant the tree and Cocka will put the dirt back in.
Cocka : But this Sengkor on emergency leave today .... even tho Sengkor not here today dat doesnt mean me and Linpeh kenot do our job wan mah! rite anot? we dunwan you all say we garmen workers only know how to snake!
Linpeh : Yala ... so please dont kacau us doing our job ok? we want fast fast finish here then go yum char later.
Ahpek : MCH!!! ini majiam also can??!!!

.