When You Purchase a Bus Ticket to go back to your Hometown ... What do you expect?

Chinese New Year is just around the korner and needless to say ... regardless of whether you are chinese or malay or indian ... lotsa peeple will get on a bus to balik kampung during the long holidays.

So when you purchase a bus ticket, what do you expect from the bus company? I would at least expect that I will be arriving at my destination safe and sound! Arriving later than schedule is totally acceptable coz at least I m safe and alive!

But that is not always the case you see .... there is this double decker bus thats heading for the north ..... and what happened to the passengers in the bus will haunt them forever ...

"According to the survivors, the top deck was swaying left and right as the driver was going really fast. Some passengers at the bottom deck saw the driver smsing a lot and driving really fast in the heavy rain.

After awhile the passengers felt something amiss and saw the bus driver STAND UP suddenly(while the bus was moving!) and split seconds later, the passengers screamed really loudly and the bus spun three times, hit the divider and careened to the opposite highway where an oncoming MPV crashed into the back of the bus. Nian Ning and Mohd Zailani were sitting at the back row.

I’m not sure about the other chinese boy who also passed away. But that’s what I’ve gathered. The passengers of the MPV only suffered minor injuries. To add insult to the injury, the bus driver only sustained a broken right leg. I’m curious to know what is happening to him now though."

Read More HERE & HERE

At some point of time, we all need to take bus ... if its not us then it will be someone close to us ... do you want this to happen to them?

What can we do? Well we could tell the our gomen that we would like something to be done about this issue by signing on this PETITION!!!

Go ahead ... make a different today .... make Malaysia road a safer place and allow us to travel without the fear of losing our own life. When we purchase a bus ticket, we are paying to get to our destination NOT paying to go to heaven/hell!

Cuci Mata Wednesday - Mongolian Beauty

Today cuci mata post .... we learn how to appreciate fine beauty la! That means look at face oni ok? S0 today .... hands no need go under the desk la!

Got this email from my KKP saying that this girl suppose to be a Mongolian, she is almost doll like! Exactly like those Jabpenis mia anime character!

Look at her pwetty face .... almost doll like!

Look at those watery eyes .... like can talk lidat!

If she smile at me lidat ... I can melt right in front of her!

If I dont tell you she is not a doll .... you might think she is one of the linpeh olin piao mei produck!

Serious face also can kill lu!!!

Air Asia got go Mongolia one anot??!!!

ERm .... got a bit of longkang ... if u see clearly lol!

Long legs sial!!! LONG LEGS!!!!

If ask u to give up 10 yrs of your life to have a gf lidat you want anot??!!

I prefer her to have less makeup and in more casual kinda clothings .... lidat more chun!

This is her face up close ....

How? Chun anot?! And this is the real human ok? not those iPiaomei by Linpeh! So perfect mia girl mana mau cari?!?!!!

Now you baskets tell me .... if ask you to give up 10 yrs of your life to have her as gf/wife .... u want anot??!!!

The Best Business Logo By Far!

Sometime kan ... we dem perasan that we got this "hidden" talent in us to do creative stuffs! Lets say you opening a new business and you know abit of graphic editing ... so you designed your own Logo .... and it looks something lidis ....

This is my Favourite!!! Nick named "The Computer Doctors!" .... but if you really sucks in drawing .... you should really hire a professional graphics designer to help you do you "mouse" because you did not hire a pro .... what suppose to look like a "mouse" is now looking like something that could shoot "white ink!"

Now you know why your folks always thot you been watching porn on internet?

Lets say my company name is Pagoda Sun Ltd. .... therefore I will draw a pagoda and then behind the pagoda is a sun! That's easy rite? Piece of cake! ..... eh wait! ..... why it looks like something else wan? like something poking something lidat geh?!! LOL!!!

When you tried to act smart by adding words together gether or trying to coin a new word .... but little you do realised that ... certain words kenot mix wan! Especially the word "Kids" and "Exchange" so now people who have too many doters will send their kids to your place to change them to a boy! KAKAKA!!!

A Style! Kanneh!! This logo i love much much!!! Dem farking creative ok? Dem creative if they opening massage parlour or chicken den la! other than that ... i doubt they will be getting the "correct" kinda customers LOL! Might as well change their name to Doggy-Style la!

I think this fler is doing Pediatric center but on top of that they got provide some sexual relieve also for those in great pain .... look at the logo ... if thats not a icon for BJ then i dunno what is! LOL!

I think this logo is farking telling the turth ok?! Do you realised that its more expensive to visit a dentist than a regular lokter? I was once quoted 4k to get a 4 piece denture permanently fixed to my mouth!! And its just like what the logo is telling you .... "Come! Lemme screwED YOU! "

I think I dont have to explain much ... if a pharmacy got this kinda logo ... then you should know that .... that pharmacy is sure to be specialised in sexually realted mia products wan!

Graphics designers are here for a purpose! So please use their services can? You are really not as talented as you think you are! LOL!


p.s. tenkiu smm for these piktures!

Wingz Can Cook - How to Make Soya Milk for CNY .....Traditionally

Its prolly because CNY is coming and the economy is really bad ..... this CNY everibodi wanna save money so .... the amount of searches I got lately for "How to make soya bean drink / how to make soya milk" thru google is tremendous! Thanks to this post HERE I think lotsa phuackers ledi curseD 9 me for bruffing them ...

So ... to make up to those who is searching for the Real Method to make Soya Milk the traditional way I made this post just for you! CNY is around the corner and you could save some bucks by making your own healthy, preservative and flavour free soya milk!

Ok now ... spare all the craps ... lets get down to business ( I still got cookies to bake later, so fast fast finish this post and start baking ... if not later my wife weck 9 me! LOL!)

Ingredients :

1. Soya Beans 500grams
2. A Jug of clean water (to be use when you blend the soya beans)
3. Pandan Leaves 5-6 leaves will do
4. Sugar to taste
   

Equipment / Tools required :

1. Traditional coffee filter (the kopitiam type)
2. A Sieve (plastic of metal also can)
3. 1 big bowl (ceramic or plastic also can)
4. Pot for boiling (around 10 liters stainless steel stock pot will do)
   

Method :

Preparing your Soya Beans

1. Soak your Soya Beans for at least 4 hours (if can soak overnight its better)

2. Drain access water from your soaked soya beans.
3. Put about 100 grams of the soya beans into the blender, pour about 100ml of water into the blender before proceed to blend.

4. Pour the soya bean paste into a bowl and repeat step 3 until you finished all the remaining beans.

5. Cut pandan leaves into smaller section so they can be inserted into the blender, add 300ml of water and blend till you get a green colored liquid. (like the picture below)

Boiling your Soya Beans

You have to boil/cook your soya bean, if not it taste like raw vege juice wan!

1. Fill your stock pot till about 3/4 full and bring it to boil.
2. Pour in the Soya Bean paste into the boiling water.

3. Proceed to boil under low heat while stirring constantly with a spatula.
4. Should be boil for at least 30 minutes.
5. Remove from the stove and left to cool down before filtering.


Filtering your Soya Milk

This is the final process ... after this all you gotta do is to add sugar (or maybe you like to drink it without sugar ... that you your own prefrence la!) and its good to drink ledi!

1. Use a coffee filter and put a sieve on top of it. This combination is so that the sieve will filter the bigger chunks while leaving the cloth type coffee filter to deal with the smaller particlaes of the blended soya beans.

2. You could either pour the whole bloody pot onto the filter (which you will definitely make a mess by spilling the soya milk everywhere) or you could do one scoop at a time like how i did.



3. Add Sugar and Viola! Your own home made Healthy, Creamy, Flavour free, Delicious, Natural Pandan Soya milk!!! This CNY no need buy YEOS packeted drinks ledi! LOL!

Seriously ... its very easy to make Soya Milk ... furthermore soya milk is rich in protein and others vitamins and most importantly ... the kids loves it! err .. and adults too of coz!

Go ahead ... try it yourself! and if you got into any trouble ... just send me an email ... CNY mia pasal I gibe lu free consultation wokeh? :)

Happy Trying Aunties and Uncles and Ahbengs and Ahlians!

ATM Scam! This is how they get your ATM Password!

This Happened in China .... very soon the rest of the world will catch up .... so it pays to know ok?

*Click on the above image for a clearer view

Got see that small dot on top of the ATM machine anot? That one is a Micro Camera la! Thats how they got your password la! They looking at what numbers you keying in mah!

So if you goto any similar ATM .... pulez be more alert ok? look for any suspicious signs and do not proceed if you found anything "outta da ordinary" ok?

Better be safe than sorry! CNY around the korner oni ... ppl will do anything to get hold of some easy cash!

Early early alredi kena! Dewww!

mch ...... CNY kambing ledi .. drink more water ... gonna be very hot soon!

I m the living prove .... *sigh* .... Im in the clinic waiting for my medicine when i made this post.

*this post done with HTC tytn ii on Digi Edge.

Cuci Mata WedASSday!!!

There is 2 types of guys in this world .... the Boobs type and/or the Ass type ... which one are you?

You see ... its lidis wan (to those who derno la!) ... the boobs type will 1st scan the boobs 1st ... if ngam kalo they will proceed to scan the secondary object ... which might be the ass or the face ... depending on their personal preferences of coz ....

Whether you are the boobs or ass type ... rest assured i got your covered!

Enjoy!

p.s. : All image click-able wan! click to see clear clear la!

OMFGBBQ!!! So round wan!!! like fullmoon!!! Jiejie can i bite you??!!

Faster drop coins wei!!!! FASTERRR!!!




Phuiyoo!!! got front got back wei!



Nose bleed laaa!!



FLESHHH!!!!



Wah lau eh!!! So big n firm!!!



This one "S" shape wan wei!



Oi! this one no wear spender wan!!!



Safety First! Air Bags for cyclist! BIG AIRBAGS!!





Mamamia~~



Tight pantssss!!!


Dem solid sial!!!



I think this wan bigger than her ass!



Jiejie ... walk faster!! *bounce bounce bounce*

I think I m more towards the ass type .... What are you? C'mon dun be shy!! I know u memang dem 9 hamsap wan! Dun pretend la!!! WUAHAHAHAHA!!!

What Can Speed from Jilo to 100 in a Few Seconds?!

Tonite we had a MMC gathering ... all 3 members of the MMC club come together for this one nite a week to yumchar and rant about how difficult it is to be a good husben ..... (MMC stands for Mehlid/Married Men Club la!)


Then this Henry from this previous post did it again! ...

Henry : Yesday I kena again from Pam (his wife)
Me : Wat izzit this time?
Henry : I forgot her birday! (We men really no pay attention to small small details like birday wan u no? ... its not our fault! God build us lidis wan!)
Ahkeong : WHAT?! We just warned you on the day you crashed her hardisk rite? Ureally no sked die wan la!
Me : Then what u kena this time?
Henry : This time dem kaw wan! I think I need to slave myself for 10 more years only I can finish paying for forgetting her birday ....
Ahkeong : 10 years??!!! WTF? She ask you buy her what? Bungalow ka?
Henry : no ... but she said this to me ... "I dont care whether you did it on purpose anot .. tomolo there better be something new in the porch that goes from jilo to 100 in a few seconds or else I will see you in the loyar's opis!" ..... you guys know my pay rite? I where can afford a sepot car la??!!
Ahkeong : WUAH!! your wife mia knife very sharp wei! no wonder I see your neck dem bloody ledi la! kakakakaka!!!
Henry : MCH!!! luff 9 me izzit?!!
Me : Eh .. wait wait ... you sure thats exactly how she said it?
Henry : Word by word!
Me : HAHAHAHA!!! I know how to get you outta this shit buddy!
Henry & Ahkeong : How how??!!
Me : Come closer .... dunwan let ppl hear ...
Me, Henry & Ahkeong : Jijijum jijijum .... kilikoloo ...
Ahkeong : KAKAKAKAKAKA!!! Good one wei!!!
Henry : You sure this will work anot wan?
Me : Niahma! Gerenti will work wan geh! No bruff you wan geh!! This is what she really wants la!!!
Henry : MCH ... if I die .... I take you both with me!!!
Ahkeong : Wan lidat meh? KAKAKAKA!!!

You wanna know what I asked Henry to buy instead of the Sepot car? Scroll down for answer la!
(kanneh long time no do this ledi ... last time this trick is pioneered by me wan!)
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BUY HER A BATHROOM SCALE LA!
You see ... Henry's wife is kinda "plump" .... so if she stands on the scale ... it will definitely spped from JILO to 100 in less than 2 seconds flat!!!

KAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!!


P.S. Aunties Aunties sekalian ... if you husben copied my trick ... you all dun come find me to bash me wokeh? NOT MY FAULT LEH!!!

Latest Robbery / Car-Jack Tactic

This is a comunity message brought to you by Rojaks Daily :

Dun care whether this is true or not ... it sounds logical to me and by any chance this happened to you ... at least you knew what to do.

Read on for your own safety while driving ....

Dear friends,

The latest tactic used by robbers to stop you while driving and to rob, rape or slash you has come to my attention after a friend of mine was trapped in this situation.

LATEST CASE

My good friend was driving along Kesas Highway with his wife just after Plaza Tol Puchong towards Kajang last Sunday 23rd December at around 11 pm after attending a dinner function at his relative's house in Bandar Sunway.

Suddenly, a motorbike overtook them and the pillion rider threw 2 eggs towards his car windscreen. Within seconds, his whole windscreen was smeared with the messy broken eggs. His immediate reflex action was to turn on the windscreen wipers which quickly covered the whole surface and blurred his vision.

So he immediately slowed his car and brought it to a halt along the emergency lane.

Then he got out of his car and was trying to wipe and wash the windscreen while his wife was seated inside the car. All of a sudden a Proton Satria stopped behind his car and 3 guys came running towards him with Samurai swords screaming at him to surrender his car and wallet.

Luckily my friend, who is attached to the police CID, managed to pull his gun out and fire two warning shots in the air. The 3 guys ran helter skelter back into their car and drove off at a very high speed.

He called up for assistance and was told the getaway car had a false number plate.

Apparently, this tactic has been used quite often in the latest string of road side robberies especially with lady drivers or men driving alone or with women and small children.

So please, should you encounter such a situation, REMEMBER to make sure:

1) Not to turn on your car windscreen wipers.

2) Continue driving, with whatever available vision, to the nearest petrol station, police station, 7 Eleven store or any other crowded or brightly lit place to attract attention.

Please forward this information to friends and family members.

Be Safe & take care!

Wingz Can Teach - Canto Lesson no.1

Very seldom Ahbeng will use street language and to deal with them you need to know what they really mean.

Today i m gonna teach you Ahbengs wannabe 2 new sentences .... they are :

1) Um-Tum (pronounced as Arm-Dum in canto)
2) PYT (Abbr for Pei Yan Tiu)

Um-Tum and PYT is closely related and can be use to compliment each other in a way to enhance your daily communication skills as a Ahbeng.

i.e. : Ahbeng just got rob by a Mat Rempit, so Ahbeng will say lidis ...

Ahbeng : Today really Um-tum la! first first I forgot to buy 4D yesday and today my number come out first plize! Then in the afternoon I PYT .... my briefcase kena snatched by Mat Rempit!
For a better understanding of what it really means (literally) by Um-Tum and PYT, we hired a kungfu specialist to further illustrate to you.

Please watch carefully ... as each of the 2 sentence above will be fully explained in the below video clip.

For the meaning of Um-Tum please notice clip marker from 48 seconds till 57 seconds and for the real meaning of PYT ... refer to video clip marker from 59 seconds onward.

If after watching the video also dont understand then you really need to go PYT la!

Enjoy!




Who want learn "iron eggs" kungfu? Fast fast come register! Learn ledi no sked Um-tum and PYT wan! Your kkc will be so powerful no Um-tum or PYT can hurt u! KAKAKAKA!!!

WHY YOU SO RUDE WAN??!!

A conversation between two flers during a yumchar session ....

Linpeh : Oi Cocka, that day you tell me that place you buy printer ink very cheap one rite?
Cocka : Yar .... then?
Linpeh : Diu! Tell me the name of the shop la! no name how to go?!
Cocka : Fook Yew!
Linpeh : MAHAI WHY YOU SO RUDE WAN!!! FARK YOU TOO!!!

During anoder yumchar session conversation between 2 flers also ...

Laundryamah : Eh! Yesday I go this kopitiam eat fish ball noodle ... phuhhhh!!! They make the best fish ball noodle i had my whole life man!
Cocka : I also love fish ball noodle wan!!! How to go? Whats the name of the kopitiam??!!
Laundryamah : Ng Tew Lee!
Cocka : WHY YOU SO RUDE WAN??? Did i say something wrong?? Why suddenly dunwan fark me wan?

*Ng Tew Lee in canto means No fark you

The funny name of chinese restaurants and businesses .... i think enuff material for me to publish a book also!


*P.S. Tenkiu Cocka n laundryamah for the piktures!

Lidis Also Can!

Got a few farking funny mia video mau share sama lu olangs .... plomise you wont luff loud loud ok? If you luff loud loud then you kena fire befoh CNY you dont kam find me ah!


Why this never happen to me why I fly wan??!!!




I have a dog too .... and I will remind myself not to eat brownies or choco muffins when i bring him out go walk walk!



This is classic ok? This will serve as a lesson on us who lafu to use bulutoot one ... ppl dunno u toking on the phone wan la! I kena ledi for a few times ledi ... I was toking on the phone and the fler beside me thot i m toking to him! But if you go 7-11 at nite to buy something ... pls dont do what the fler did in this ad ok?



I no cat wan ... so i m not worried being mistakenly marked as a cat killa! lol



If you have a doter and you fetching her out to party .... make sure you dont give her money the way that fler did in this ad ok? MCH! Dating your own doter is not something you wanna get yourself into!



Lucky our country dont have P0rn shop ..... if not alot of hamsap ahbengs will also kena "mistaken" by your spouse! KAKAKAKA!!!



The moral of the story is ... if you hate your mader in loh then dont serve her blekfas in bed!

And the finale of them all!!!

Amadikans are NOT Stupiak!!!



Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did! Have a nice weekend everybody!

V-Fee

I learnt a new word yesday ... its called V-fee

Overheard from a conversation between 3 "Gold hair" Ahbengs on the table next to ours yesday during our mamak session ....

Ahbeng 1 : MCH! that setarbark at leisuremall mia V-fee kenot use one la! that day I go there and use but kenot.
Ahbeng 2 : Eh ... Sg. Long there got one kopitiam got kasi free V-fee one leh! that day i go there with my fwens and try .. can use wor!
Ahbeng 3 : You mean secret recipe or oldtown kopitiam?
Ahbeng 2 : no ah! this one is hawker stalls lei geh! opposite the Maybank there.
Ahbeng 3 : Wah! There also got V-fee? Next time lepak there better la! Drinks also cheaper ... bring our computer and play Dota there ok?
Ahbeng 1 : Ok ok set! tomolo we go.

There u go .... if you wondering Watdafark is V-fee ... I was as blurr as you guys but after a while i finally figure it out ... its WIFI!!!

For those Ahbengs who derno how to pronounce this word ... its pronounced as Wai-Fai NOT V-fee or WeeFee!!!

Next time derno how to say ask first la dun simply tembak! Bikin malu oni!

Next time u go starbark asking for their password "alo ... can i have V-fee password pulez?" Diu! kakakakaka!!

HTC Kaiser Tytn ii

Was given the opportunity to play with the latest PDA phone that hit the market recently. News had it that this unit is completely SOLD OUT!

Retailing at about RM3,288 (with freebies) and its sold out?! WTF??!! So many rich basket around??!!

Codename HTC Kaiser, this baby is pack with features! Comes with GPS, Wi-Fi IEEE 802.11 b/g, 3G, EDGE, 3.5G HSDPA, Window Mobile 6 Professional, built in QWERTY keyboard, tilt screen, QVGA screen, Bluetooth 2.0,

Been using it for 3 days now but its too early to pass any firm judgement .... so far got pros and cons la. I got another 2 weeks to spend with this before i gotta gibe it back so if you wanna full review of this check back later ok?

If you is Hamsap and you is Ahbeng ... and you are wondering ... Yes this unit can go online and watch p0rn wan ... hamsap piktures also can! I triED edi la!

Cuci Mata Wetnesdei

Little do i realise that its alreadi wednesday and it has been a while since i last do Cuci Mata post ledi .... all you hamsap ahbengs must ran outta ideas to tfk ledi ... not wanting to be the sole reason for you to blame when you pipe clogged (becoz too long no use ledi) this week i kasi continue itu cuci mata post!

This time this siu mui mui got Fresh Flesh!!! Pak suet suet wart luet luet wan!!! As usual ... all hands on desk while watching/reading cuci mata post! Dun let your hands wanders bawah meja can??!!

Enjoy!









Wokeh ... you guys can go toilet now!