30 November 2007

Another Defective China Product?


WARNING :
18SX - Small bois n girls ... go do your homework! Dun read! go play PS2 or PS3 or Wii or PSP or hello kitty or hello puppy or anything as long as u dont read this post can edi! If you die die also wanna read ... then call your mum/dad at work and ask for permission 1st ok?
Oh! and its NSFW too! Its not for the Faint hearted neither! Pls do not proceed if you have a weak heart ok?

Note : NSFW means Not Safe From Work .... so, if u kena fire bcoz you read my blog at work ... u dun kam find me ok?



Its not a new thing anymore ... China products has been well known being defective. IF you dont briff then u goto RM2 shop and see for yourself la!

Defective is one thing but if you have been following the news, they even tried to poison the whole world with toys and toothpaste lol!

Anyway today i discovered another defective China product .... this product is previously owned by Linpeh, Linpeh go China and bring this product back for his own pleasure wan .. mana tau during the first night ... before he got the chance to use the product ... the product jialat ledi!!!

What the product I m toking about? Heres the video taken by Linpeh right before the product exploded right in his face!




Afdter watching the video ... i think i prefer the iPiaomei by Olin at least its safer la!

29 November 2007

Ahbeng Go Pishing


Long time no tell lame Ahbeng joke ledi, partly also becoz of me Ahbeng joke too popular ledi and everyone been telling them so I thot why dont take a break from Ahbeng since hes getting too fehmes ledi but after long long no tell Ahbeng joke I very the miss Ahbeng la! So here kams anoder Ahbeng joke!!!

Ahlian : Ahbeng where u going?
Ahbeng : I go pishing
Ahlian : Har? pishing again? I thot u gave up pishing ledi? the last time u go pishing you dint catch a shit and you swear dunwan pishing ledi wan wor ....
Ahbeng : I plomise lu this time I will catch some pish one! If i dont catch anything I will quit!
Ahlian : You say wan har! Dun bruff me har!
Ahbeng : I wont bruff you wan! If i bruff my kkc will kena curse till kenot stand!
Ahlian : EEEKKK!!! why say lidat worrr
Ahbeng : Abuden? I dunwan bruff you mahh! ok lar i go pishing la!

Ahbeng also drive to deep deep rural kampung area and sit by the lake and start casting his line la .... he sit there whole afternoon under the blardee hot sun but after 5 hours ... dont say fish la, ikan bilis also kenot catch! Sommo its getting dark ledi ... so no choice ... like it anot he kena go home ledi or else he wont be able to find his way back to the car once it turn dark.

While driving bek he remembered his plomise to Ahlian ..... "Aiyah! mch! If i dont catch any pish I kenot go pishing anymore! how can lidis?!!!"

So while on the way back he stop by the pasar malam looking for his regular fish monger Maniam ....

Ahbeng : Wuah Maniam!!! Dei!! I so happy to see you! How diwali? ada best?
Maniam : Taukeh ! long time no see man! Diwali misti chun lar taukeh!
Ahbeng : Maniam lu gibe me this 3 tilapia pish .... please throw to me ok? You throw and I catch!
Maniam : Dei! Taukeh ... you got eat wrong medicine ka? Why ask me to throw the fish at you la?
Ahbeng : you dont care la! I dunwan bruff my wife ... I told her I will catch some pish bring back one ... so i kenot break my plomise.
Maniam : OH ... boss lidat solila ... today tarak tilapia fish.
Ahbeng : What tarak? then this is what pish? you bruff me izzit? dei you want die anot?
Maniam : Taukeh I say tarak means tarak la! You take siakap la! Today siakap fish very fresh ... i cheap cheap give you ok?
Ahbeng : Why Siakap pish? I want tilapia la!
Maniam : err ... just now your wife Ahlian got come .... she told me if see you come buy fish ... ask you to buy siakap becoz she got bored eating tilapia ledi la!


Ok .. those who love to go pishing one ... any of you done this before anot?? Dun bruff ok?

28 November 2007

Cuci Mata Wednesday - GT Chickas

If you derno yet ... lemme tell lu this ... in the world of GT Racing there is no such thing as flat chested chicks! Flat chest chickas does not exist in GT Racing world!

But I bet you derno why its lidat rite?

Lemme teach you something today! Those GT drivers will feel secure around airbags since they cant have any in their cars! LMAO!!!

Ok la enuff craps lame jokes ledi .... Cuci mata time! oh .. before we proceed ... remember all hands on desk ok? dun let you hands wanders below waist level can?!



a.2
Huh? What car??



b.2
korkorrr ... my name is itchibawah!!!


c.2
woi belakang "run light" la!



d.2
Your smile so sweet korkor heart melting lerrr


e.2
You make funny face also no use ... its not your face i m looking at! LOL


f.2
This chick looks like not enuff sleep oni ....


g.2
Hankook really got talent in finding non flat chested girl one la!


h.3
I swear ... they looks like they gonna drop outta her bra anytime!


i.2
korkor ... low enuff anot?


j.2
Jane is that you? Me Tarzan la! u lemember anot?

Oi! where you hands dissapeared to ledi???!!! Faster put your hands back on the desk!!!


That concludes anoder session of cuci mata wednesday! tune in again same time next week for anoder interesting episode!

26 November 2007

Idiot + Fireworks = Disaster Waiting to Happen

There is a good reason why they shouldnt sell fireworks to idiots like him! Watch how he blew up his "manhood" in this act! Angmoh and thier stupid stunts will keep you entertained for hours! LOL!




Sometime these angmoh amazed me with those stuffs they willing to do in the name of stupidity! LOL!

25 November 2007

Wingz Can Cook - Roti Goreng Rojakz / Rojakz Toast

Yes ... I can cook! Those who are new to this blog prolly dunno bout it yet bcoz it has been quite awhile since I made this kinda post .... furthermore its weekend and I am just freaking lazy to drive to anywhere .. therefore i decided to cook. I really dont have any idea what i wanna cook today, so obviously the first thing to do is to dig the fridge for anything thats suitable for me to make a decent meal.

I found white bread, canned green peas, canned baked beans, sliced cheese, eggs, ketchup, some minced beef etc etc ....


With all that and also with the company of Micheal Buble singing in the background I created Roti Goreng Rojakz a.k.a The Rojakz Toast! A simple, healthy and most importantly cheap to make family blekfas fit for all Ahbeng and Ahlians alike!!!

First Lets take a look at the ingredients, dont have to be precise ok? no measuring required .... everything is "to taste"


Ingredients


You will need the following :
  1. Roti / Bread (sliced one of coz)
  2. Eggs (one egg per slice of bread)
  3. Butter for pan fry (olive oil or regular palm oil also can)
  4. Salt and pepper to taste
  5. Herbs as per your likings but i suggest parsley or spring onions/shallots and onions.
  6. Minced beef or chicken or pork you could even use ham or bacon if you have it.
  7. A mug or glass for making a hole in the middle of the bread. Up to you to make watever farking shape you want also can la! not necesarily must be round one what? I used a wine glass.
  8. Non Stick teflon Coated pan (Note : - if you dunch habe non stick teflon coated wok then u might as well forget it ok? you gonna burn 9 the bread and the eggs and it will stick on the the wok and you gonna curse 9 me for spoiling your blekfas! so dun say i neber warn you ah! )

The Sauce
  1. Canned bake beans, canned or frozen green peas
  2. Ketchup (Tomato sos la!)
  3. Ground beef or chicken or pork or watever meat you can get your hands on.
  4. Salt, sugar and pepper to taste


Method :



1. Get yourself a piece of bread and place it on a flat surface (chopping board would be very useful if yours is still flat la! I seen some chopping board got a hole so big onnit you can even hide a chicken inside!)



2. Then you use that glass (whatever shape your is) to make a hole in the middle on the piece of bread. I used a wine glass to make a round shape in the middle of the roti. Remember to press kaw-kaw so that the shape is cut out nicely.




3. Your bread should look like this if you do it correctly ... if not then do again lor! Do not throw away the "center piece" of the bread ok? you will need it later on.



4. Heat your pan with low heat (minimum if can) place a small amount of butter onnit just to test whether you pan is hot enuff anot .... you could also use your finger to test the temperature if you dont mind the pain ok? It helps to wake you up if you still half awake! LOL!



5. Place your cuttED bread on the pan and place small amount of butter into the center hole you cutted out just now. While waiting for the butter to melt you can crack an egg into a small bowl and get ready to pour the egg into the center hole once the butter meltED.

Why crack the egg onto the bowl first? well if your kungfu is good enuff you can actually crack the egg onto the pan directly ... but if your kungfu is not powderful enuff then you might break the yolk and the whole thing will look fugly when you are done.

Must always remember this ... a good food will not only taste good but it has to look good too! At least good enuff to make them wanna eat it right?



6. Pour your egg onto the hole and make sure the heat is at its minimum or your bread and egg will be burnt and instead of making Roti Goreng Rojaks you would be making Roti Goreng Africa!

Right after your poured your egg you should season it right away with a small pinch of salt and pepper.

You could choose to turn both side of the bread if you like your bread to be throughly toasted, as for me I only wanted one side of the bread to be toasted.

Keep the heat low and cook the egg to your liking. Some peeple would actually prefer to have the yolk uncooked, so its entirely up to your liking ... just hafta watch the heat thats all. Should be simple enuff la ... if lidat also u can screw it up then you really shouldnt cook anymore!



7. When the egg is cooked to your liking, at this point you could place a piece of sliced cheese on top on the bread covering up the egg. In low heat cook till the cheese melts. The cheese should looks abit puffy when its done.

Can springkle abit of parsley, spring onions, ham or salty bacon bits at this point of time whatever you put onto the cheese will kinda sink into the cheese once its melted. Again, whatever you put onto the cheese at this point of time is entirely to your liking also.



8. Remembered the "center piece" we took out in "step 2 & 3" just now? Well ... if you havent eat it yet .. its a good time to take it out and place it on top of the melted cheese. This piece is very important to help hold up the sauce because without it .. the sauce will melt into the cheese and the whole thing will collapse.

After you are done with these bread then place it aside ... we gotta make some sauce for our spesel toast rite? Kids love sauce you know? Dun say kids la ... I myself also love sauce! lol

The Sauce :


Sorry ... i dint take any photos while I am making the sauce because I forgot that I am suppose to post it up as an entry! MCH! age is catching up la! what you expect? lol!

Anyway the sauce is fairly simple la! (this is actually adapted from spaghetti sauce)

  1. Drain all excess water from your green peas and get those baked beans outta can.
  2. heat your pan with 2 tablespoon of cooking oil then throw in chopped onions and fry them for a good 10 seconds under medium heat.
  3. throw in the rest of the stuffs, namely .... Ketchup, baked beans, green peas, ground meat, shallots, salt, sugar and pepper to taste. (sugar is used to reduce the sourness in the ketchup)
  4. You are pretty much done with the sauce .... unless you wanna add something else in there.
  5. Its important that you do not add any water into the sauce, you want the sauce to be thick so it will be kinda sticky and could stand up by its own. Furthermore if the sauce is too watery .. it will turn your toast soggy and the toast will lose its crunchiness.
Take a good spoonful of the sauce and put it on top of the "center-piece"bread that you gorengED just now. And after you are done doing that .. it should looks something like the pic below ... if not ... i think you better goan call for pizza delivery la since nobody gonna eat your stuffs anyway lol!


From the top


From the side

Layers cross-section

Roti Goreng Rojakz a.k.a. The Rojakz Toast a simple, colorful, tasty, crunchy and healthy blekfas for the entire family! The kids will like this one, mine did! he whacked 5 pcs!

You taken your blekfas yet?

Thats all the time we have today! tune in again next time for anoder episode of Wingz can cook!

Others Episode of Wingz Can cook :
  1. Wingz Can Cook : Pan Fried Prawn with Creamy Cheese Sauce
  2. Wingz can Cook - Homemade Carrot Ramen
  3. Wingz Can Cook - Homemade Egg Tart
  4. Wingz Can Bake - Wingz's Home Made Pizza
  5. Wingz Can Cook - Pocket Fish Fillet
  6. Wingz Can Cook - Chinese Sausage Claypot Rice (Larp Mei Fhan)
  7. Wingz Can Cook - World Simplest Western Food
  8. Wingz Can Bake - How to Make Basic White Bread
  9. Wingz Can Bake - CNY Cookies

Rainbow Chaser and Stunning Images

Just wanna share some amazing images that i captured with my cellphone ... just photos no words ok?





23 November 2007

of Erection and Bush(es)

This is what you gonna get to see during e-e-e-e-erection if you have someone call "Bush" as your country's President!!!

All images are scalable, click on the images for a larger view.


ATT3657687
Bombing for peace is like farking for virginity!


ATT3657688
We shaved our pubic hair ... Read our "lips" no more BUSH!!!


ATT3657689
Bush is another word for Cunt!


ATT3657690
The only "Bush" I'd trust is my own!

U-u-u-u-u t-t-think we-we-we w-w-will see this kinda stuffs during our e-e-erec-tion anot??

Why so Farking Jam in KL Lately?

If you driving to work and you staying in KL then you should know about the blardee Chee-buy jam all around town!

I was in the car with my oldman this morning ... and he asked me ...

Fader : Why so jam?
Me : The last time got time kinda blardee block were a few weeks ago where got ppl go palace there do demonstration. I think should be something similar guah ...
Fader : MCH! Ppl wanna go work they do this kinda things! Mau demo also kenot ledi meh now? We still a democratic country or we changed to komunis ledi?
Me : HAHAHA!!! Pah .. that one u no i no la! No nid say out ledi wan!


04jam2
Pics courtesy of The Star

You know why so jam anot? If you derno then lemme tell you why .... its because of Hindraf!

Huh? What you mean wat in Hindraf? You mean you derno what is Hindraf? Neither do I! LOL! but thanks to The Star I finally found out what is Hindraf ledi ... Hindraf is
(Hindu Rights Action Force)

But why becoz of Hindraf got roadblock? According to the newspehpah ...

The roadblock operations, which started yesterday, were to screen motorists entering the city centre and to identify troublemakers ahead of the planned mass gathering of Indians outside the British High Commission in Jalan Ampang.

Police said suspicious motorists would be inspected and their vehicles searched.

The public is advised to stay away from the gathering and police will not hesitate to take stern action against those who refuse to take heed of the warning.

“We have received information that there will be criminal activities taking place right up to Sunday’s gathering. From our intelligence gathering, we found that riots and fights had been planned. We are now taking precautionary measures,” said city police chief Deputy Comm Datuk Zul Hasnan Najib Baharudin.

He said the roadblocks had been set up at all entry points into the city centre.

At least 20,000 people are expected to take part in Sunday’s gathering and the protestors had been told to dress in orange.

The assembly is to submit a petition with 100,000 signatures to Queen Elizabeth II to appoint a Queen’s Counsel to represent the Indian community in a class action suit against the British government for bringing Indians as labourers to the then Malaya and exploiting them.

The suit, filed at the Royal Courts of Justice in London by Hindraf chief P. Wathyamoorthy in August, seeks compensation of up to US$4tril (RM13.5tril), or US$1mil (RM3.4mil) for every Indian in Malaysia.

[Source]

WUAH!!! RM3.4 Millions!!!! Lemme check with my oldman whether we got any indian blood anot ... maybe can get RM1.7 million also I dun mind!!! KAKAKAKAKA!!!


22 November 2007

iRojakz


Wanna know where got latest terrorist happening? check out this Website! its called Global Incident Map displaying the latest terrorist party around the world! Thanks to Linpeh becoz hes farking free ... he goan find this kinda things to keep himself entertained!


This morning while having blekfas i realised got one pair of eyes "kap" 9 me eat .... at first I thot got fansee can recognise me la ... i tell myself "Wahlau eh! I so fehmes la!" then I pretend cool lidat dunwan look that side and continue to eat my wantan mee.

After 5 minutes lidat i can feel the same fler still "kap" 9 me .... that time abit uneasy ledi ... why he still notchet come ober ask for my authograph wan geh? MCH!!! I Rojaks wor! I so Fehmes wor! Faster kam over and get my autograph la!!! faster kam over and tell me how my blog rawks la!!!

anoder 5 minits passed and still he habent come over ... I beh tahan ledi ... dunwan act cool ledi .... i turn my head and see who is that basket keep "kap" 9 me wan ... this is what i saw ...


Image026

MCH!!! that fler wear his sunglasses terbalik!!! sommo botak wan!!! Kanneh! no wonder I felt like someone is "kap"-ing me la!!!! Diu lor .... Perasan sial!!! MCH at that point of time i really feel like wanna dig a hole and jump innit myself!

Next time dun wear sunglasses lidat can anot??!!! Dun luff!!!



On anoder incident ... yesday I post up this image :

a.1

And I challenged readers with balls to print it out and stick it to their cubicles or monitor or anywhere where their boss can see it and guessed what?

2.39


1.48

This fler got balls! this fler stick it big big where the boss can see it! lets hope the boss cant read for fark sake! lol

One fler took the challenge! and she dont even have balls! who is she? Shes working as a telephone operator for those lonely line ... you know? when you are lonely ... u pickup the phone and call them .. then they will say to you "korkor you lonely anot jek? come! muimui company you!" those kind la! U dun belif me? U see her pic yourself lor!


grace
Hiao anot??!! Can tahan anot??!!

See? see? got talent anot??!!! kakakaka!!! who want tok to her fast fast call 600-173-173 now!!! each minit charge is RM99 only!!! OR if you are as broke as me .... you can goto her BLOG for some free view geh! LOL

21 November 2007

Cuci Mata Post - Shanghai Piao Mei


I evolved from a midnite blogger to a blekfas blogger, then from a blekfas blogger to a lunchtime blogger ... later maybe bekam dinner blogger!!!


Before we proceed .... I dare you to print the below pics out and paste on your cubicle or put on your desk or stick it onto your monitor!! Show your boss who got bigger balls ok?!!! U got balls anot??!!

a.1
Click on the above image for a full size printable pikture.



Nah here is the Miss Shanghai Piao Mei the 3 finalist to let u cuci your mata! I bulum makan lunch yet so i tarak masa mau taruk caption, who free to write caption for me? I taruk them up and credit sama lu want? Can email me or leave a komen here wokeh?



b.1



c.1



d.1



yc
I tot i taw a cameltoe!


e.1
Her hooters!!! I Likey!


f.1



g.1



h.2



i.1



j.1



k.1



l.2



m.1



n.1



o.1



p.1



q.1



r.1



ko



pc


That concludes our cuci mata session for this week! tune in again next week for anoder episode of Cuci Mata Post!!!