A Spesel New Year Greetings from Rojaks Readers

Hahahaha .... i just cant help it, I saw this pikchure at Yingci's blog and I curi-Ed the pic, photoshop it and post it here!


Guessed I would like to have that many peeples to wish me a Happy New Year!!

How I wish these were real LOL!

I know I said it before but i wanna say it again,

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006!!!

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Rojaks New Year Resolution - The one that doesnt exist

Its that time of the year again, lotsa peeples is busy making their resolution for 2006 but I m a bit different. I never made any resolutions, maybe subconciously i had made a few but nevertheless it was forgotten as soon as its made lol!

Why i dunwan make new year resolution ah ? Actually I got make la ... my new year resolution is the same very year which is "NO RESOLUTION" hahaha! why for make resolution that i m not gonna keep anyway ? I m too much of a loose canon and i dont think i can live happily thru-out the entire year being bounded by a few resolutions that i made without knowing what might happen further in the future.

Buden, after reading so much of what others bloggers wrote I would imagine what would be my New Year Resolution IF I am forced at gun point to make one.

1. Quit smoking! - Tho u got watch in TV (last time) that smoking is cool and will make u very the yau yeng, its all bullshit/lies !!! smoking will give u bad smelly breast breath, stained tooth, sore throat, lung cancer and finally slow and painful death. Dispite all that, peeple still continue smoking .... really "Mm jai see" one! that actually includes me of coz. I figured, either i gave up smoking or i goan burn all those cigarette producing companies down whichever is easier lol

2. Stop buying pirated stuffs - Including mp3, vcd, dvd, software etc. Nowadays if u go eat at food court, during your 30 minutes meal you will get around 30 vcd peddlers storming to your table bugging you with all the vcds/dvds movies. The got everything from the latest movies till the very the adult movies and at RM6 bucks a piece i reckon they are making RM3 bucks for each vcd they sold.

Why i dun wanna buy from them ? I know this guy who make cds for a living, CD are just a piece of plastic with a coat of reflective metals on them. He is selling them out at RM0.20-RM0.40 a piece depending on the quality, so u count yourself la ... 2 cds with 2 pcs of printed papers and 1 plastic bag how much only their cost ? less than RM1 and they are selling for RM6!! So, now you know why they keep kambing bek even tho the polis alredi tangkap them over n over again la, who dunwan to do ? mahai so high profit leh !!!! better than selling Feng Tau pills!!!

3. Stop saying - Crappy New Year to the flers that i dont like LOL! You know how Happy and Crappy sounds alike when u say it fast enuff ? This is what i used to say to those "sohais 2 face cibais" that i dont like, instead of Kung Hei Fatt Choy I will say "CRAPPY NEW YEAR to you !!!" ok so this year i m not gonne do that anymore (hahahaha ... try n stop me)

4. Stop picking on timid staffs - his one i really cant help it. I dunno why but my staffs are very very afraid of me wan. I once asked a girl "Why u got problem like this so long ago now only you tell me ?" she answered "sorry I am very afraid of you" mahai u say laaa!! like this mia answer also got! So from that day onwards I know they are are bloody sked of me and i go around the place terrorizing them hahahaha. I realised I got talent in this terrorizing thingy, all i need to do is to walk around and you will see all those worker all panic ledi lol .... most of the time this is very teh fun lol but ok lar maybe this year i try to turn on a new leaf, maybe i will even try to be their frend also hahaha ...

5.Pay more attention to my career and chat less in msn and irc, in 2005 i didnt put much effort in taking my career to a new height, unlike all the previous year this year is totally stale. Dint feel like i achieved much career wise. This is also the year i discovered blogs, and I started one in Jan 2005! I think I paid too much attention to blogs and bloggings ledi, thats why my career is going no where in 2005. Starting fron 2006 i kena be more displin and must plektis time management, not to mention type faster too (so i can finish my post faster lol)

6.This year must seriously find a place to migrate to ledi in the near future, the grass in this part of the world is turning yellowish ledi .... I dont like yellowish grass so kena find greener grass to chew on or else will die starving pretty soon. 2005 is a bad year for small businesses and i dont foresee 2006 is gonna be much different from 2005 either, so peeples ikat that belt kuat kuat!!! hang on! the ride gonna be pretty bumpy in 2006!

7. Money is not everything BUT without money you got nothing! yea, find more ways to make money! Money no enuff especially if you got an entire family on your back. Hopefully can turn pro blogging very soon and can live on adsense income alone like the rest of probloggers. *hints*

8. Lose alotsa weight!!! like 30 kilos !!!! i figured that if I stop eating now, by the end of 2006 i might be able to achieve my target of 30 kilos weight lost LOL!! either that or I would be 6 feet under, whichever come first.

9. Find a Lauya college - and buy myself a MBA, then frame it up and hang in my opis. I think with all those offers i got in my email account, I can get a MBA for less than RM1000 .... maybe can get a Doctorate for myself then u all kena call me Lokter Wingz liow lol

-More to add later tonite now i go do my work 1st-

Continuation - Post from home

10. Call Astro and fark 9 them - been subscribing to Astro for almost 5 yrs now, whenever the commercials come up the volume will suddenly increase and sked the shit outta me! I dunno whether this is only happening to my decoder or unirversally its lidat. I checked with my frends before they response is also the same. What da fark is Astro trying to do ? some kinda physicologyical tactics so make us more aware of their ads ?? WTF?? I m paying to watch movies and dramas not to watch your knnccb commercials !!!

11. Stop abusing the neighbour's cats - stop setting traps and poison baits for the stupid annoying unattended, garbage digging cats that roamed into my garden to shit all over the place. From this point onwards I will TRY to be nice with them, setting up proper trap to trap them and send them to SPCA and have them put to SLEEP!!! WUAHAHAHAHAAA!!!! DIE CAT DIE !!!! ops ... excuse me ... thinking of the plan got me carried away lol, I actually love cats wan haha!

12. Stop teaching Lil Devil to ogle at lenglui and whistle Pheeweettt when a lenglui pass us.

13. Start Behaving - like a proper parents and stop teaching Lil Devil to swear at the peeple of my choice LMAO!

14. I need to take - up yingrish night class to brush up my yirngirsh so i can blog better.

15. Stop buying more toys for myself and start buying educational toys for Lil Devil. When I go shop with Lil Devil for toys, we always ended up with toys that i wanna have instead of what Lil Devil actually wanted. I know this is wrong but HAVE YOU BEEN TO TOYS 'R' US before? I just cant stand the seduction of a well stock toy store!!! You cant blame me ok! I dont have much toys to play with during my chilhood!! lol~

16. Time to visit Yun Nam Hair Care Center, hair line is getting thinner n thinner, its either Yun Nam Hair Care Centre or Wigs shop very soon lol

Unlike my buddy Ahpek who still can remain sane even after the ups n downs I think I m going insane ledi not to mention my sense of humour, I need this blog to make sure that my sense of humour is still intact, otherwise i couldnt tell the different bcoz I alredi gone cuckoo-ED haha!

Have a Great Year ahead! Happy New Year 2006!

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Neighbourhood Pub with Ahbeng Bartender

Its New Year eve, Loke and Meng were looking for a small pub to do their new year countdown. After searching for sometime they finally found this Cina Ahpek style mia pub, and its getting late both of them also tired from the days work so they decided to spend their new year eve in this pub.

They walked in and noticed that all the table were taken, so they headed toward the bar and took a seat each. Loke ordered a jug of Heineken beer for Meng and himself from The Botak Bartender. While waiting for their beer they started some small talk.

Loke : Meng i heard you just join MCA wor .... looks like u finally wanna masuk politik huh ?
Meng : Aiyah at first I thot i anna join MIC one but they dunwan accept me.
Loke : Why MIC dunwan accept lu ?
*Before Meng could answer that question the botak bartender bring their jug of Heineken beer with 2 glass*
Botak Bartender : Eh you two must be new here, here knot tok politik wan laaa, I dunwan kena ISA lokap ok ?
Loke : ok ok soli ....
*Botak Bartender go bek to work*
Meng : what laaa!! tok politik also knot! what pub is this la diuu...
Loke : nebermind nebermind we tok other things la, I dunwan kena kick out leh
Meng : Eh Loke you christian right ?
Loke : yar I thot u know I christian what ?
Meng : I know lar but i dunno u what kinda christian katolik ka or the other one ?
Loke : Katolik lar...
Meng : eh good ... I always wanna ask bout the Pope one, People got tell me that the Pope .......
*The Botak Bartender suddenly show up in the middle of the conversation*
The Botak Bartender : Oi Oi!!! no tok religion, here very sensitive tok religion. Last time got geng fight after toking religion.
Loke : Mahai tok politik knot, tok religion knot THEN TOK SEX CAN ANOT???!!!!!
The Botak Bartender : Tok sex can lar .....
Loke : THEN FARK YOU LAR !!!!

Walker - Portable Speaker for Notebook Computers and Mp3 Players

Nah, this is not what i got for xmas. I just wanna share this foldable little portable speaker I got myself about a month away from Mines IT Center, Mines Shopping center. Apart from being totally portable this little pair of speaker does provides lotsa bangs for your bucks.

Opens up and unfold a pair of Portable Stereo Speakers

This foldable portable speaker really redefine the meaning of portable. You swivel it to expose the other half of the speaker. The footprint for this little pair of speaker is very very small when folded together, its really a space savers especially if space is a limitation. It will fit nicely into any briefcase or lugage.

The Package - Portable Speaker, Audio Wire, and a USB Power Wire.

The complete package comes with the Walker speaker, an audio wire and an USB power wire. No driver no fuss of that kind, just plug and listen away. The quality of the sound are nothing to shout about and at max volume it sounded like a person singing thru a megaphone (those type of microphone my headmaster will use during our skool assembly back in 1980s') but at low and mid volume this little pair of speakers is not bad at all. Kinda weak on bass but treble is crispy enough.

Audio and Power Jack on the hinges of the speaker

Volume amplification are pretty high, I dare not blast the speaker with max volume for long but i reckon this speaker would actually explode if would blast it at max volume over a period of time. Built quality are somewhere mediocre but no very filmsy but at that kinda price I m not complaining,

Yep! It can even be powered by 3 pcs of AAA battery

This is really the best part, this pair of foldable speakers can actually be powered by 3 pcs of AAA battery! how cool it that! i mean, now you can listen to your mp3 from your portable mp3 player like Ipod, muvo, creative zen etc ... with a pair of portable speakers !! Cool huh ? hehe

All in all, it cost me RM23.90 for the whole package. At that kinda price what more can i ask for ? So goan get yourself a pair of Walker portable speakers (if you need any) before they (the vendors) read this review and decided to hike up the price.

No, I m not getting paid for this altho i pretty much wish someone would do so hahaha!


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Rojaks Christmas Pikchures

Pikchures of my Christmas Celebration with Rojak's Family in no particular order :

Santa Getting High~~ on wine


Aunt Marriane trying to remove Santa's Sarong

Santa of the Year - Unc Tony

Santa in the making

Santa abit high ledi

Santa the Rapper

Time to unwrap presents!!!

Lil Devil running around mugging everyone to give him presents

Santa in the making

Oh Yeah??!! My dad gonna buy me bigger toy than you got!

Ahfu can you speed it up alredi ? I wait very long ledi ok ?

Hows Xmas ? well lets just say Xmas is mainly for kids so does CNY, for adults like me Xmas and CNY is just a time where our is wallet is being stabbed mutiple times and we will slowly bleed to death. LOL!

Anyway, I think I just lost the motivation to blog! Happy Nu Yar Peeple! Happy 2006!!! I Lebiu ALL!!!!

Little Drummer Boy - Past and Present

Little Drummer Boy

The words and music to the Christmas song Little Drummer Boy was composed by Katherine K. Davis, Henry Onorati and Harry Simeone in 1958. The lyrics of Little Drummer Boy consist of no less than 21 rum pum pum pum' - a major part of the song and therefore presenting an apparently easy task for the lyricist! However, Little Drummer Boy has been a huge hit for several artists. The most notable rendition was created by the most unlikely combination of Bing Crosby and David Bowie. This version of Little Drummer Boy was a massive hot for the artists and was in fact Bing Crosby's most successful recording since the legendary White Christmas.

Source

That was in 1958 where the "Little Drummer Boy" will look like this :

The Traditional Little Drummer Boy

Now I present to you Little Drummer Boy Rojak Style !!!! Ladies and Gentlemen the :
LITTLE DEVIL DRUMMER BOY !!!!!

The Little Devil Drummer Boy

I know i said this before but Its Christmas now, Merry Christmas Everybody! yes I mean everybody, even to those who hated or still hates me, my sworn enemies, friends, comrades, relatives, braders and sistas, parents, grandparents and everybody else!!!!
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Jingle Bells Remix a Christmas Song by Rojaks

As a kid growing up in Kampung Baru Ampang I have lotsa stories to tell, one of them being a typical Chinese Christmas.Back in those days my grandpa always bring me to kopitiam on the back of his bicycle, in the kopitiam there is this Story Teller Uncle, I still remembered how this Story Teller Uncle taught me how to sing Jingle Bells in Cantonese and after seing how a Linpeh colaborated with a group of bloggers and came out with their own version of White Christmas I decided to share my own version of Rojaks Jingle Bells as well. This is a last minute thingy therefore I do not have adequate time to ask for the participation of others bloggers.

This is my first single (which are made available to the public at large) and the music were taken from "Jingle Bells - Crazy Frog" the length of the song is approximately 1 minutes and 1.2mb. It took me a good 4 hours to put this all together and I hope you all will enjoy it.


WARNING! Before you proceed to download this song, Please read the below terms and conditions :

1. If you are easily disturbed by Religious Jokes please do not proceed.
2. My voice sucks, so just pay close attention to the lyrics not the voice ok ? I admit I cant sing for peenuts.
3. Those Lyrics are not written/created by me, I m merely sharing what i learnt from The Story Teller Uncle. I doubt he knew who the original author is also.
4. I just wanna spread the Spirit and Joy of Christmas, remember the song "Tis the Season to be Jolly shalalala" ? So, pulez do not condemn me ok ?
5. You had been WARNED! Proceed under own risk. Otherwise please exit now.






CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD!


MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NUYAR from Rojaks & Crew

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2 Seater Plane Crashed in the Himalayan

My first attempt on beekambing a journalist, I wrote this article about a plane crash that happened in the Himalayan weeks ago and mail it to SEE-AN-AN, I havent got any response from them yet so I thot why let a good article go to waste right ? then I post it up for you all to enjoy lor ..... :)


Yindia up in the Himalaya moutains theres a small village with only less than 200 population by the name of Tumjab (I made up one lar dont bother looking in Google map) this town is very da primitive wan, they dunch habe TV or lehlio. Skool also dunch habe, so this is why the people there abit supa IQ wan. 99% of them never left the small village befoh also, they spent most their life up there in the Himalaya flying kites, humping goats and chasing bears.

Buden one day got this 2 seaters plane with 2 peeples inside (i think its called Cessna single engine propeller plane) crashed onto their ancestor's burial ground (cementary/graveyard la). The plane exploded on impact and the whole village mia peeples come out n see, its like Chinese New Year fireworks show lidat.

After they realise the fire would actually spread to their village they all begin to work together passing buckets of water to put out the fire. After the fire were gone they beging to clear the wreckage and look for the bodies in the wreckage. By the time i receive this repot the Himalayans alredi found 150 bodies and they are still digging for more ......

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
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Christmas Gift for Grandson

Richard is calling his daughter (Mary) to check whether she, her hubby and their son is coming back to celebrate Christmas in the Kampung.

Richard : Mary are you gonna celebrate christmas with us this year ?
Mary : Yes Pa, we already made arrangement to be back in Ipoh to celebrate christmas with you and mum this christmas.
Richard : I am very happy to hear that Mary! I want to go buy my grandson Nikki a Christmas present, tell me what kinda toys he would like to have ?
Mary : Pa, Nikki is only 2 years old, he dont really know how to play with toys yet. We already got him lotsa educational toys so I dont think you should bought him any toys, I rather you bought him something useful like Scott's cod liver's emulsion oil or Vitamins for kids that would be great for his health ler Pa.
Richard :like that har ? ok ok I will buy him some vitamins for him to consume while hes here, is that ok ?
Mary : Sure Pa, look I got to go now I'll see you at home on Christmas eve ok Pa ?
Richard : Ok Mary, take care Mum and I will be waiting for your arrival.

After Richard hang up the phone he took the key to his car and went shopping for vitamins for his grandson. He just cant wait as this is the 1st time Nikki is spending Christmas with them in Ipoh. After a while of walking around in Jusco he managed to locate a pharmacy that sells vitamins for children. Richard walks around the pharmacy looking for what he want but there is one problem .... you see Richard did not even finish his primary education so actually he is illiterate. Unable to get what hes looking for, frustrated he walks to the Pharmacist to get help.



Richard : Hiya, Im looking for vitamins for kids can you show me where is those vitamins situated ?
Pharmacist: They are on the first shelf on the left entrance.
Richard : I m sorry but can you shw me where ? I m not good with directions.
Pharmacist : I m sorry sir but I am not allowed to leave this counter, but they are pretty easy to locate.
Richard : I told you ledi !! I m not good with directions (Richard trying to hide the fact that he cant really read)
Pharmacist : Ok sir, I guessed I can keave this counter for a few minutes, but only for a few minutes ok ?
Richard : Good then lead the way.
*They arrived at the shelf displaying lotsa children's vitamin*
Pharmacist : Sir its all here, I got to go back to the counter now.
Richard : Wait wait!!! I want you to recomend me some children's vitamin thats good before you go.
Pharmacist : But sir, I gotta go back to the counter now
Richard : Do you want to me to talk to your boss ?
Pharmacist : ok ok lets get this done with ASAP, I dont wanna get caught being away from my counter! I could get fired for this so make it quick ok ?
Richard : OK so recomend me some vitamin for my grandson.
Pharmacist : What kinda vitamin do you want ? A, B or C ?
Richard : WTF!!! does it matters ??!!! hes only 2 year old!!! he cant read alphabets yet!!!!
Pharmacist :



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Marriage Certificate

Ahpek and Ahhuei has been married for 35 years alredi as of last October. One night Ahhuei caught Ahpek wakeup from bed in the middle of the night "kwai kwai shee shee" goan look for something in the closet.

Ahhuei pretend to be still sleeping as she wanna know what Ahpek is looking for, after a while Ahpek seems to have found what he is looking for. Ahhuei look at the clock and it was 2am in the morning, after a while of watching Ahhuei dozed off again without knowing it herself.

By the time Ahhuei wokeup she realised that its alredi 6am she then looks around for signs of Ahpek and realised Ahpek is still at the same spot looking at the same thing. Curious, Ahhuei get out of the bed and walks towards Ahpek to see what he is doing.

Ahhuei : Ahpek what you doing la middle of nite wakeup
Ahpek : I kenot sleep la then i suddenly remembered something so I wakeup to look for it lar
Ahhuei : Look for what ?
Ahpek : nothing la you go back to sleep dont kacau me.
Ahhuei : Eh ... what are you doing with our Marriage Certificate ah Ahpek ? U been looking at this certificate for the last 4 hours ??!!!
Ahpek : Ya lar why knot look one ka ?
Ahhuei : What you looking for in our Marriage Certificate ?
Ahpek : I dunwan tell you .. later u scold me, I not so stupid
Ahhuei : Dont lidat ler lowkung .... tell me ler ... i plomised i wont scold you one.
Ahpek : you sure anot ? dont bluff 9 me wor
Ahhuei : Sure la ...
Ahpek : ok lar I trust u ...
Ahhuei : Then faster tell me what you are looking for in this Marriage Certificate laaa
Ahpek : Actually I am looking for an Expiry Date on this certificate ler why dont have one laaa...

How Much Does Childbirth Hurts ?

I honestly admits that i dont know how much does childbirth hurts nor I am the best person to talks bout this topic, at least not untill today. I mean we guys would not have a chance to experience chilbirth as that is totally not in our job descriptions entirely. But today I learn something very valuable during my lunchtime.

As usual I like to take my lunch late, sinply bcoz I do not like the lunch hour crowds, the lottery seller, the annoying "sir can i have 5 mins of your time" craps seller. I had my lunch at around 3pm today and yes its pretty peaceful and quiet. I order Wantan noodle today and next to me were the a few food hawkers sitting down taking it easy and chit chatting away. Did i mentioned it was kinda quiet ? I guessed I did, I m telling you this bcoz i dont want you to think that I m kepoh or what. They just happened to talk abit louder and I just happened to heard it dats all. haha! Did i tell you that its very quiet in the restaurant ?? lol

Ok ok heres the conversation i overheard, but before that I just noticed that i dunno them by their names and Its very long to address them by their profession, so I made some shortform to make my jobs easier. And of coz the conversation is in cantonese, I translate it into yingrish bcoz thats the only language i can type in.

CHICMAN - Chicken Rice Man
ECONMAN - Economy Rice Man
PANMEE - Paan Meen Lady
CCFUN - Chee Cheong Fun Lady

The Conversation :

CHICMAN - : Feipoh!(PANMEEN) you terror la! 5 yrs give birth to 5 babies dem productive hor you ?
ECONMAN:Eh you mean her hubby productive or she ?
CHICMAN - : hahahaha
PANMEE: Eiyer u all very hamsup wan!!
CCFUN: Ya la they all memang hamsup wan, every month go hapcai.
ECONMAN: Eh Feipoh, wanna ask u har ... u give birth so frequent not pain wan meh ?
PANMEE: OF COZ PAIN La!!
CHICMAN - : Eh dont bluff la! you give birth so many times ledi i think your hoe also numbed ledi haha no feel liow hahahaha
PANMEE: Choiii !!! see lar hamsup again !!!
ECONMAN: oi dont hamsup larr I asking serious question here sial!
CHICMAN - : ok soli soli, feipoh tell us lar how pain har ? decribe to us ler
PANMEE: VERY pain ok
ECONMAN: diu very pain means how pain ?
CCFUN: Why dont you try to give birth then u know la!
CHICMAN - : Aiyo we man knot give birth one laaa bodohhh
PANMEE: ok ok dont gaduh I will tell you how pain but you both will hafta do what i tell you to so that you will feel it.
CHICMAN - : BOTH ??? eh not i ask u wan leh .. ECONMAN ask u one leh u ask him do lar i dunwan do
ECONMAN: ok ok I do as you say, so tell me I wanna see how much it hurts
PANMEE: You sure you wanna know? Its very painfull one leh
ECONMAN: Eh dont worry I can tkae pain one, last time I poke nails all over my body during the Kwan tai kong temple celebration ok ?
PANMEE: ok lor lidat I tell you lor
PANMEE: 1st you take your upper lip and pull it out
*ECONMANdid as instructed*
PANMEE: Does it hurts ?
ECONMAN: abit only la ?
PANMEE: not yet lar, u pull so sikit. Pull more larr!!
*ECONMANstarts pulling his upper lip further and further away from his teeth.
PANMEE: Hold it there! now is that painful ?
ECONMAN: yar abit more than just now but still its very mild only la
PANMEE: Aiyah u pulling like a pondan lar, lemme help you la
*PANMEEpulls ECONMAN's lip kuat kuat*
PANMEE: Now does it hurts ?
ECONMAN: OUCH!!! yes its blardee painful!!
PANMEE: Actually thats not yet the actual pain, but i better stop here bcoz i dont think you could take the real pain of childbirth
ECONMAN: OI u dont look down on me ok ? I can take it! c'mon take me all the way!
PANMEE: you sure ?
ECONMAN: YES!
PANMEE: ok then keep pulling your upper lip but this time pull it long long!
*ECONMAN did as instructed while holding back the pain and looks like a retard at the same time*
PANMEE: LONGER!!!
*ECONMAN keep pulling*
PANMEE: Ok ok hold it there! thats long enuff ...
*ECONMAN showing signs of relieve*
PANMEE: NOW STRETCH YOUR LIP AND OVER YOUR HEAD AND COVER YOUR FACE WITH IT !!!!
ECONMAN : *DUMBFUCKED*



HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! They are one bunch of freaking funny hawkers!!!!


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King Con! ops ... I mean King Kong!

Those of you who watched King Kong the Movie already should remember this scene, this is the scene where Kong battle the T-Rex and Naomi Watts who act as Ann Darrow got caught in the middle.

Seriously, the movie is not bad at all even tho the movie is kinda long (3 freaking hours). There is only 1 very obvious thing that made the whole movie seems so oh-so-fake, its Naomi Watts!

What bout her you asking ? if u notice carefully hor, she can run like crazy chicken trying to get away from Kong, drop several hundred meters down a valley, ran away from those T-Rexs, grabbed by Kong's dirty hands (Kong walks with his hands one ok ? and dont tell me its not dirty at all), swing here swing there, didge this climb that and her face is still very the clean!! still looks OH-SO-PWETTY! which is totally unacceptable!!! where is alil bit of logical common sense here ? This film is made by big name wei! the same director who made Lord of the Ring!!! How can they neglected this minor detail huh ? Dem kaw fake isnt it ?

See for yourself, look at Naomi's face .... this scene is where the hero ngam ngam rescued her from the hand of KingKong, after all the strugglings he face still spotless!! Can straight away join Miss World Beauty peagent also! hahaha!! i think hair also still nicely intact leh lol!

Then the Last scene where Kong were running berzerk in the city thrashing cars and buildings before Naomi Watts turned up. Her dress ... blardee white, dont tell me Kong didnt dirty his hands while he is doing all the thrashing and killing hor ? how come at the end of the movie the dress still remain so white-ish ar ? camera tirck har ? kakakaka .... makai this movie they fast fast wanna finish it so can make money fast fast .... no heart wan ... simply tembak only!!!

Anyway, ignore me pls.... I just want the traffic only. everybody is writing about King Kong and I just wanted a piece of the pie myself WUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Adios!!!


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Finally! The answer to the Chicken And Egg Question.

I was in Kota Kinabalu early this year spending the nite over in Promenade Hotel (spelling corrected by applepie), a customer of mine (Desmond) insisted that he will accompany me for breakfast in the hotel and to be honest I m longing for a company. I have been on the road for 9 days and everyday I have been eating breakfast alone in the hotel. Just face it, no one gonna wakeup bloody early in the morning to eat breakfast with me *sigh*

after 9 days of Hotel Buffet I can tell you what I m gonna get even tho this is the 1st time I taking my breakfast in this hotel, so me and Desmond decided to go ala carte even tho buffet is totally FOC. Both of us took a look at the ala carte menu, a few minutes later Desmond ordered some kinda omlette and I ordered Hainanese Chicken Rice.

After we placed our order we chat for abit while waiting for our food to arrive. In the midst of chatting I realised something, we just ordered eggs and chicken, now egg and chicken is the big question everyone is asking everybody! but right there and then I seems to have the answer to that question. I then turn to Desmond and asked him this :

Me : Desmond have you heard about the Chicken and egg story ?
Desmond : You mean which comes first ? the chicken or the egg ?
Me : Yup! thats the question.
Desmond : yup! what bout it ?
Me : Everyone seems to be seeking the answer and right this moment i have the answer to that question itself.
Desmond : Whoa .... enlight me pls my ears are all yours
Me : Its rather simple really, you just gotta be more sensitive to your surroundings
Desmond : Like now ?
Me : Yea exactly like now!
Desmond : Care to be a little more specific ? I m lost here.
Me : Look the answer lies within that waiter.
Desmond : That waiter ??!! I m trying to see the relevency here but that waiter gonna give us the answer ?
Me : Yea, I told you the answer are rather simple.
Desmond : Ok ok tell me what kinda answer will the waiter give us ?
Me : Well that all depends.
Desmond : On what ?
Me : On the question of coz!
Desmond : The question remained unchanged since the beginning of this conversation, its the chicken and egg question and we wanna know which comes first.
Me: Yup exactly! cant you see by now ? the answer would totally depends on whether the waiter will bring your egg or my chicken first! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Desmond : you are a bloody joker arent you ?

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Xmas Tag

Tagged by Helen, honestly I dont like doing tag or meme. I dunno why, prolly bcoz I m farking lazy or I just do not have enuff intelligence to properly finish a tag all by myself ??

Anyway, this tag by Helen is kinda simple so I thot I give it a shot. Dont scold me if I screwED this up okeh ? BTW Im not a YehSowJai so my knowledge of Xmas could be very well limited.

State who tagged you;
- List who you want your Santa Claus to be (the bearer of the gift);
- State the gift you wish to get;
- Then invite a few friends to join the tag, and inform them by dropping a comment in their blog.

State Who Tagged lu : Tagged By Helen

List who you want your Santa Claus to be (the bearer of gift) - Can have more than 1 anot ? I got 2!

SaTam Claus

1. I want SaTam Husin to be my 1st Santa Claus. [SaTam Claus or Santa SaTam]
Why : Because he still got lotsa hidden treasure all around the world. If hes my Santa, I'll ask him to gimme his "OTHER" swiss bank accont number and password, I also want all his hidden oil rig. with those oil rigs I can help reduce the price of Msia oil price and give joy to lotsa peeples.

You dont look down at this old fox. I am sure he is hiding lotsa stuffs from the Amadikas, if not where his mahchais got money to buy all those bombs n guns to whack kaw those Amadikans right anot ?

If he gave me all his money ledi then his mahchais also no money to buy guns n bombs and those Amadikans also no need to die lar!! SEE SEE! I m not doing this for myself one u know!!! I m doing this for his mahchais and those Amadikans in YeeRaq!! LONG LIVE SATAM!!!

His name is Odoubi Tokunbo - sounds like relative to Obi wan Kenobee

2. A SucksesFool Nigerian Scammer to be the other Santa Clause.
Why ? Wise Chinese peeple (Confucious) once said "If you love your chewdren dont gibe them marney, teach them how to make marney instead. So if you kaputED ledi they wont starve to death". How true hor ?

Thats why i chosen this nigerian scammer to be my second santa la, My 1st Santa (Saddam Claus) gimme heaps of money ledi but if i dont learn to make more myself i very soon will pokai also, so i decided to ask this 2nd Santa to teach me how to make more money! I wanna learn the secret of how to be a SuckesFool Nigerian Scammer then I dont have to be afraid that I will starve one day.

Lets face it, this world is fulla GREEDY pigs! These pigs will keep sending me marney, all i hafta do is to continue sending fake lottery emails only. Easy anot ?? But the hard part is ... i gotta get myself really Tan 1st ... prolly as Tan as he is ... which is kinda difficult if not possible. Maybe if i use shoe polish it would be easier and darker ? What you think ?KAKAKAKAA!!!!



Lastly I wanna past this Xmas Tag to these few Sohais (p.s. New addendum : You can have more than 1 Santa wan leh!!! )

Ahpek : Bcoz Helen alredi bribe me, Helen actulee shiok kat Ahpek wan but she shy to tag AHpek mah so she asked me to tag him on her behalf lor!
Eggy : Bcoz he reminds me of Humpty Dumpty and he sapotED my theory that Hamsups peeples goes to heaven wan.
AlexAllied : Bcoz his design kaw my new layout and dem kaw chun ... i very the likey!
Wolfy : Bcoz he can do wonders with his Camera and he still owe me lotsa juicy pics which he plomised to send to me but i have yet to receive.
HokkienLang : this one is my buddy, not much peeple know who he is but if he dun do this santa thing everyone will know who this guy is! Wuahahahaha!!! mch i m evil!!!
Suanie Tew : Bcoz she just kena rob, so i think her choice of Santa would be very interesting! also i Arm LuenED her so long ledi so i take this chance to hint to her abit. I Lebiuuu !!!
LocKee trading : Bcoz I dunno this guy much but got aunty told me that this fler dem kaw rich ... so I wanna carry his ball abit. Hopefully he gimme big big Xmas plesen!
Kennyjai a.k.a. Kennysia : Bcoz his photshop skill very kengchow so I looking forward to see his new creation.
Liz : Bcoz her header dem kaw Xmas mood, I m sure she will put on Santarina Costume and camwhore wan! I WANNA SEE!!!!
SimonTalks : Bcoz hes my brader and hes also a Christian, so i think he very happy to do this one ler. If he dont do then I show u his pic from this year mia PPD bash ok ? HAHAHAHAHA!!!
KY : This one my brader too! this fler dem kaw terror wan, he can drive, can cook, can draw, can pimp, can camwhore, can throw party. Hes throwing a Xmas party i sked he no invite me if i dont tag kaw him ler lol!

diu lor ... I tagged 11 flers liow ... better stop b4 someone come whack kaw me hehe ...


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Collection of Pictures I got in my Nokia Handphone

Lil Devil at Tiara Beach Resort Port Dickson Reception

Sexy Lenglui Lober in Asia Cafe
Lake View from Fatty Crab Restaurant around Mines

Lil Devil at Seven Swords

Lao Ma Chi - Chinese eatery in Low Yat's basement


Sunset at MRR2 Highway


Gifts From DiGi

Koi Pond at Night

Lenglui from the Office

Black Tip Shark Staring at you

Ex Secretary turned Best Frend - Lucy

Natural Smiley Face on Door Frame

Pebbles the dog

Lil Devil on a See-Saw

Impul March .... its Nissan actually

Lil Monster - My Kaijai